Four-lorn
by Laura013
Summary: Chapter-by-chapter re-tell of Divergent in Four's POV. Rated T to be safe. Please give this a chance, and don't forget to review! :)
1. Four-lorn ch 1

**Hello lovelies! This is basically a chapter-by-chapter re-tell of Divergent, but in Four's POV. This chapter is the second half of Chapter 6 (so it's quite a bit shorter than most of my chapters will be, because it's only a half sizer) of Divergent, because that's when Four shows up. Please give me a chance and hit the follow button! I promise it will pick up as it goes :D**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

I stand by the member's entrance to the Dauntless headquarters, Lauren a few feet away. Any minute now, someone will jump. At least all I have to do is wait. It's my job to announce the first jumper. Lauren flashes me a smile. Lauren's a nice girl, but I don't know her too well. I don't want to get to know anyone too well. I shift from foot to foot as I begin to call up to the top and ask what's taking so long, when a gray smear flies across my eyes and into the net. I blink my eyes, to see if I saw the colour wrong. _No, it's Abnegation grey_. I haven't seen an Abnegation transfer since… well since me. Lauren and I run to the net, reaching out our hands. She reaches for mine and her touch sends a tingle up my skin. I grip her arm tightly, holding on to it like a lifeline until it is apparent that she can stand straight without my help. I let go slowly.

"Thank you." Her voice is shaky, yet it has a strength to it that I don't expect.

"Can't believe it." I had forgotten that Lauren was behind me. She smirks at the Abnegation girl. "A Stiff, the first to jump? Unheard of." The term 'Stiff' raises hairs on the back of my neck. I've always hated that word.

"There's a reason why she left them, Lauren." I try to resist the urge to roll my eyes. I look at the girl, my gaze softening. "What's your name?"

"Um…" she hesitates. I sigh. I remember the day when everyone asked my name, and I didn't want to tell them. Amar was there to help me, and he helped, all right. I want to help this girl to. I don't know why, maybe she's just a piece of home, but something about her drives me.

"Think about it," a smile begins to play on my lips, "you don't get to pick again." _It's like a second chance._

"Tris." She sounds firm and strong, much stronger than I would've pictured for an Abnegation.

"Tris." Lauren repeats the name with a twinge of respect shining in her voice. "Make the announcement, Four." I look over my shoulder, up at the little specks that are the new initiates.

"First jumper—Tris!" I try not to let my old Abnegation pride show, but the people on the roof seem to happy to notice. They cheer and pump their fists, and then a Candor girl jumps. Everyone laughs at her screams, but they cheer for her all the same. Tris still stands behind me. I place my hand on her back softly and whisper, "Welcome to Dauntless."


	2. Four-lorn ch 2

**This is Chapter 7 of Divergent (well most of it, Four isn't present at the end, so I left that out)**

**I just wanted y'alls to know that the quotes aren't mine. They are taken directly from the book, so that I don't get off track. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

After everyone has jumped, Lauren and I lead the initiates down the hall to the entrance. I have the urge to keep checking behind me to make sure that Tris is still there, and that I didn't imagine her coming. I see Tris smack into some Erudite kid and I resist the urge to fly at him, fists engaged. Lauren and Eric stop and face the crowd, and I copy their action.

"This is where we divide." Lauren's voice pulls me back to reality. "The Dauntless-born initiates are with me. I assume _you_ don't need a tour of the place." She speaks with bravado and a cocky smile as the initiates clad in black follow her. There are only nine people left with me. I see Tris, the only Abnegation, and then a few Candor, and mostly Erudite.

"Most of the time I work in the control room, but for the next few weeks, I am your instructor. My name is Four." I sigh as a Candor smart-mouth questions me. One always does.

"Four? Like the number?" I resist the urge to roll my eyes at the girl.

"Yes," I say. "Is that a problem?"

"No." She sounds almost sullen.

"Good," I reply. I feel a bit better. "We're about to go into the Pit, which you will someday learn to love. It-"

The smart-mouthed girl cuts me off again. "The Pit? Clever name." She obviously needs to be taught that she can't question her superiors like that. I walk close to her, narrowing my eyes and leaning into her personal bubble.

"What's your name?" I ask her slowly.

"Christina." She whimpers with a squeak.

"Well, Christina, if I wanted to put up with Candor smart-mouths, I would have joined their faction." My voice reduces to a hiss. "The first lesson you will learn from me is to keep your mouth shut. Got that?" She nods at me fast, and I turn to walk.

"What a jerk." She thinks I don't hear her whisper, but I do. I let it slide. Suddenly, I realise she's talking to Tris.

"I guess he doesn't like to be laughed at." Tris has that right. I'm supposed to install fear in these people, not laughter. I push a set of double doors open and we walk into the pit. The look on everyone's faces gives me the satisfaction I was looking for.

"Oh," Christina whispers. "I get it." The large underground cavern was very intimidating to people. The stores that lined the edge sold merchandise for them, but I get the feeling that's not what scared them. What scared me so much the first time was the fact that there was no railing to keep people from falling. I see Tris take a nervous step back or two, and I open my mouth to tell her it's okay, but then I close it. She has to figure that out for herself. Comparing Dauntless to Abnegation was like comparing order to chaos. In the Abnegation sector, everyone walked in even rows in drab shades of grey. There were people of every age and size, unjudged by their peers. It was very quiet in the streets of Abnegation, no one really spoke unless it was to say sorry for something. That was the most common work in Abnegation. In Dauntless, people walk every which way, running into whomever they please and talking as loud as they like. As much as I love the Dauntless chaos, I miss Abnegation. I don't want to be a violent person. But I have no other choice.

"If you follow me, I'll show you the chasm." I wave the initiates forward. The roar of water hits my ears, and I sigh. I like this place. The water is peaceful, like the calm before the storm. Tris edges her way nervously to the side. She looks over the edge, and then leaps back slightly. Fortunately for her, no one notices, or else she would be ridiculed. I raise my voice to a yell, so that everyone will hear me over the loud noise of the water.

"The chasm reminds us that there is a fine line between bravery and idiocy! A daredevil jump off this ledge will end your life. It has happened before and it will happen again. You've been warned." I mean to scare the initiates, and most look wary, but not Christina.

"This is incredible." I begin to lead them away from the railing when she speaks.

"Incredible is the word." Tris agrees, and I'm glad. I'll have to bring her up here after initiation. I lead the group of initiates across the Pit towards an archway that can be easily mistaken for a random hole. The arch leads to the dining hall. Tris and Christina smile as they search for empty seats. I sit down next to Tris. She looks at the beef with curiosity, and I realise that, being from Abnegation, she's probably never heard of beef before. I nudge her with my elbow.

"It's beef. Put this on it." I pass her a bowl of ketchup. I see Christina's eyes widen.

"You've never had a hamburger before?" She looks shocked, like it's a miracle that Tris is alive. I resist the urge to laugh.

"No." Tris looks completely innocent. "Is that what it's called?" I find the time to chime in. I hate using the word 'Stiff' but only the Abnegation don't use it, and I don't wish to be outed as being a former Abnegation, that will lead to them knowing my name.

"Stiffs eat plain food." I nod in Christina's direction, letting her know silently that the explanation was for her.

"Why?" she asks. Before I can answer, Tris jumps in with a shrug.

"Extravagance is considered self-indulgent and unnecessary." Christina answers with a smirk.

"No wonder you left."

Tris rolls her eyes. "Yeah, it was just because of the food." My ability to contain my smile fails, and the corners of my mouth rise slightly. The opening of the doors alone interrupts me. Eric comes in, and everyone is silent. His face piercings give me the shivers, although no one knows it. But that's not what scares Tris, and I can see it as she stares into his cold, lifeless eyes.

"Who's that?" Christina's hiss reminds me that I'm in public, and I must not show fear. I calm my voice.

"His name is Eric. He's a Dauntless leader." _only because I said no._ But I don't say that to Christina.

"Seriously?" She sounds shocked, and I remember she's from Candor, and everything there is by age. "But he's so young."

My face goes grave. "Age doesn't matter here."

Tris looks at me, almost concerned. I wish I could tell what she was trying to say, but I got nothing. Eric stopped, and walked to sit next to me. I see Tris and Christina both take in a gulp of fear, and Eric sits down. He nods at Tris and Christina.

"Well, aren't you going to introduce me." I stiffen at his blatant disregard for manners. I guess a part of me will always be Abnegation.

"This is Tris and Christina." I point to the two girls respectively.

"Ooh, a Stiff." Eric smirks at Tris. His lip piercings make me, and everyone around me uncomfortable. Tris flinches. "We'll see how long you last." Tris opens her mouth to tell him off, but the words obviously fail her. She looks nervous. Eric taps his fingers on the table, and I notice the fighting wounds on his hand, about to burst.

"What have you been doing lately, Four?" I raise an arm uncomfortably. I really don't feel like talking to Eric, but I have to keep up the pretense of us being acquaintances so that initiates don't become suspicious of cracks in the leadership.

"Nothing, really," I say nonchalantly. Tris's brow furrows as her eyes dart between the two of us, trying to analyze our 'friendship'.

"Max tells me he keeps trying to meet with you, and you don't show up. He requested that I find out what's going on with you." Eric looks accusingly at me.

"Tell him that I am satisfied with the position I currently hold." I hope he stops questioning me, but no dice.

"So he wants to give you a job." _Please, just stop talking._ I will Eric silently to shut up.

"So it would seem." I try to speak evasively, but he still doesn't shut up.

"And you aren't interested." Finally, I decide to shut him up.

"I haven't been interested for two years."

"Well," he says. "Let's hope he gets the point then." He claps me uncomfortably on the shoulder and walks away. Tris visibly slouches. I look at her quizzically.

"Are you two… friends?" She seems to burst with curiosity.

"We were in the same initiate class. He transferred from Erudite." I try to talk quickly and quietly, so she doesn't question me.

"Were you a transfer too?" I cringe. I hoped she wouldn't ask. I think a moment about how to take this. I obviously can't tell her I'm from Abnegation, she'd get my name faster than I could blink. I could lie and say I was Dauntless, but I don't want to lie to Tris. For once, I want to be completely honest with someone.

"I thought I would only have trouble with the Candor asking questions. Now I've got Stiffs, too?" I try my hardest to make my voice cold.

"It must be because you're so approachable. You know, like a bed of nails." Her voice is flat, and it feels like a dull blade. I look curiously at her, and surprisingly, she meets my gaze. I notice her cheeks go red.

"Careful, Tris." She gulps. Luckily, the tension is broken when someone at another table calls my name. I get up and walk over. As I go, I catch a snippet of her conversation with Christina.

"I'm developing a theory." Christina says, sounding amused. Tris just sounds annoyed.

"And it is?"

Christina picks up a hamburger, and before sticking it in her mouth she says, "That you have a death wish." I resist the urge to smile.


	3. Four-lorn ch 3

**Hello again dearies! Wow, I have been busy posting! I hope you enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

"The first thing you will learn today is how to shoot a gun. The second thing is how to win a fight." I walk quickly, avoiding eye contact with Tris as I hand her a gun. "Thankfully, if you are here, you already know how to get on and off a moving train, so I don't need to teach you that." Tris looks tired, and I wish she could get the day off, but Max and Eric would kill me if I showed favoritism. I sigh as I begin to explain the rest.

"Initiation is divided into three stages. We will measure your progress and rank you according to your performance in each stage. The stages are not weighed equally in determining your final rank, so it is possible, though difficult, to drastically improve your rank over time. We believe that preparation eradicates cowardice, which we define as the failure to act in the midst of fear." Tris stare at her gun like it's a foreign object, like she could hurt someone. "Therefore each stage of initiation is intended to prepare you in a different way. The first stage is primarily physical; the second, primarily emotional; the third, primarily mental." All of the tired, confused initiates stare back at me in wonder.

"But what…" The blonde-ish boy, who I believe is named Peter, yawns, cutting himself off. "What does firing a gun have to do with bravery?" I sigh, and press the barrel of my gun to the boy's forehead, clicking it off of safety. He freezes mid-yawn.

"Wake. Up." I snap. "You are holding a loaded gun, you idiot. Act like it." I lower my gun. Peter's eyes harden, and I'm about to ask him where he got the nerve, but I realise he's Candor. Trained to speak his mind. His cheeks go red. "And to answer your question," I continue, "you are far less likely to soil your pants and cry for your mother if you defend yourself." I reach the end of the row of initiates, and I pause. "This is also information you may need later in stage one. So, watch me."

I turn to face the wall with a dull look on my face. I've done this a million times, almost every day. I could hit the bull's-eye blindfolded, but they don't know that, so I take the shot again. The plywood square has three circles on it, and I pull back on the trigger, the familiar bang of the gun is music to my ears. Tris cranes her neck to see what's happened, and I see the look of awe on her face when she sees the accuracy of my shot. I have the urge to shoot again, just to impress them, but I resist. Everyone turns towards his or her own targets. I begin walking in a line behind the initiates. Only a few, not including Tris, have actually hit the target. Even though he isn't one of these kids, some Erudite boy, who I believe is named Will, turns to Tris and starts giving her a hard time.

"Statistically speaking, you should have hit the target at least _once_ by now, even by accident." I begin walking towards Will, but Tris handles herself well, so I stop.

"Is that so," she doesn't phrase it like a question.

"Yeah. I think you're actually defying nature." I want to punch the kid right here and now for being rude, but I don't. Tris lifts her gun and this time, she hits the target. She turns back to Will, raising her eyebrow defiantly. He smiles cockily at her. "So you see, I'm right. The stats don't lie." Tris flashes him an unexpected smile. I watch proudly as Tris, after a few rounds, hits the center of the target. She lowers her gun cautiously. Then she smiles to herself, and I hold back a smile of my own.

After a few hours, we break for lunch. I sit at the end of the table, listening to Christina and Al talk about math. I see Will sit down, but I really don't notice. I'm rather mesmerized by Edward and Myra, the two Erudite transfers, and I'm almost shocked that they are already dating. I suppose that's my Abnegation background, it still throws me to see such young people together, kissing openly for everyone to see, not even the slightest considerate that people are eating.

"Do they have to be so _public?_" I whip my head around, it was like whoever spoke had read my mind. I realise it was Tris, and I put my head back down.

"She just kissed him. It's not like they're stripping naked." I laugh silently at his comment.

"A kiss is not something you do in public." I open my mouth to tell Tris that she isn't Abnegation anymore, but Christina beats me to it.

"Your Abnegation is showing. The rest of us are all right with a little affection in public." Tris shrugs.

"Oh. Well… I guess I'll have to get over it, then." I begin to tune out of the conversation. All I hear is their laughter as Christina throws a roll at Will.

I lead the initiates into the fighting room. Everyone lines up behind the chalkboard. I stand in the middle of the room, so that everyone can see me. "As I said this morning, next you will learn how to fight. The purpose of this is to prepare you to act; to prepare your body to respond to threats and challenges—which you will need, if you intend to survive life as a Dauntless." I see a few of the initiates squirm uncomfortably. "We will go over technique today, and tomorrow you will start to fight each other. So I recommend that you pay attention. Those who don't learn fast will get hurt." I begin to name different punches, and I demonstrate. I watch each initiate to see how fast they catch on, and I'm not surprised when I see Tris being one of the fastest to get the hang of this. _She must be Divergent,_ I think to myself. I shake my head inwardly. _I doubt it._

"You don't have much muscle," I point out to Tris, "which means you are better off using your knees and elbows. You can put much more power behind them." Suddenly, and without thinking, I press my hand to her stomach. I feel a tingle burst through my arm, like a spark that suddenly burst into a flame. I'm unsure why I did this in the first place, so I make something up.

"Never forget to keep tension here." I feel my voice go much quieter than I had intended. I can still feel the tingle long after I've walked away. I freeze, my back to Tris, and I shiver. I have to stop and process what's just happened. I feel Tris behind me, frozen, and as soon as I move, so does she. I dismiss everyone for dinner.

"I'm surprised he didn't break you in half. He scares the hell out of me. It's that quiet voice he uses." I smile to myself. At least I scare Christina. My smile wipes immediately off my face at Tris's words.

"Yeah. He's…" She trails off. I stare in awe, waiting for her to say something. I see in her eye that I don't scare her, and while I should be rather annoyed, I admire her defiance. I don't know many initiates, especially from Abnegation, who aren't scared of me. The disappointment sets in when she finishes her sentence. "…definitely intimidating." My face falls, and I walk away from them, hearing a soft talk of tattoos, and I know I'm no longer the topic of their conversation.

I walk down to the shops, I'm unsure why, and then I realise it. Tris and Christina are here. I begin to walk out, but then something catches my eye. Tris is wearing a knee-length black dress, and she looks absolutely stunning. It clings to her skin, but not too tight that it's unflattering. She pulls her hair out of it's braid and my jaw drops. I stand there, staring, for a good five minutes. She is absolutely gorgeous. I hear someone yell my name off in the distance. I walk towards the door, and before I leave, I turn my face back and look at her one more time. I hear her say to Christina, "You aren't going to make me pretty, you know." _Of course she isn't. You are already beautiful._ I shake my head at my own thought and I walk out of the door.


	4. Four-lorn ch 4

**Hello lovelies! This is Chapter 9, well most of it, Four leaves about 3/4 of the way through, so I didn't get to write the ending where Christina hangs off of the wall :(**

**Well enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

"Since there are an odd number of you, one of you won't be fighting today." I step aside, allowing all of the initiates to see who they're fighting. I look in dismay at Tris, who's slot is blank.

"This isn't good." Christina speaks my mind. She nudges Tris. Tris winces at Christina's sharp elbow. She groans. "Sorry. But look. I'm up against the Tank." Tris frowns.

"The tank?" She squints at the board, searching for Christina's name.

"Yeah, Peter's slightly more feminine-looking minion." My eyes immediately shift towards Molly. She really does look like Peter, but she has Christina's body type and size, which is most likely why they were paired up. "Those three"—I notice Christina point at Peter, Drew, and Molly—"have been inseparable since they crawled out of the womb, practically. I hate them." I resist the urge to laugh.

My eyes are drawn back to the fight at hand. Will and Al stand on the square, hands up. I paired the two up to test Will, because everyone can clearly see that Al is a good 6 inches taller and everything about him just screams large and scary. I listen slightly as Christina tells Tris about Peter and his friends, but really I'm more focused on Will. Al just punched him in the jaw, and it looks like he isn't taking it too well. I notice Tris wince and Eric smirks. I roll my eyes softly and turn back to the fight. Will hooks his foot around Al's shin, and pulls Al to the ground. Al leaps back up. I see Christina wave towards the other Candors and she flashes them an over-happy smile. Tris mumbles something under her breath and Christina responds so loud I can't help but hear it.

"I like to think I'm helping them by hating them. I'm reminding them that they aren't God's gift to humankind." I smile softly, my back turned to the two girls. Will flicks his hair and turns to me, like he's waiting for me to do something, but I don't. I just stand there, arms crossed, waiting for someone to do something. I hear Eric sigh sarcastically behind me as he makes the animated motion of checking his watch. He circles around the square and begins to shout.

"Do you think this is a leisure activity? Should we break for nap-time? Fight each other!" His voice drips with sarcasm.

"But…" Al looks up, nervously. "Is it scored or something? When does the fight end?"

"It ends when one of you is unable to fight," says Eric, still looking annoyed. I take this as my time to enter.

"According to Dauntless rules, one of you could also concede." I look at Al hintingly.

Eric turns to me, his eyes narrowed. "According to the _old_ rules. In the _new_ rules, no one concedes."

I sigh. "A brave man acknowledges the strength of others."

"A brave man never surrenders."

I stare at Eric for a few seconds. He returns my glare. We are the two models of what can become of a Dauntless. I'm the one who knows when to walk away. He's just ruthless. I shoot a fast, sidelong glance at Tris, and I see she feels the same thing. I look back at Eric, and stand down. After all, he is a leader. I'm just a trainer.

"This is ridiculous." Al shakes his head. "What's the point of beating him up? We're in the same faction!"

"Oh, you think it's going to be that easy? Go on. Try to hit me, slowpoke." I look in admiration at Will. It takes guts to stand up to someone that much bigger than you. He looks so determined, and I almost root for him in my mind. But there is absolutely no chance he can beat Al. One well-aimed blow for Al and he's knocked out. That would be the case, if Al was able to land that one blow. Will continues to dodge Al's punches. Al roars, turning around. Al punches Will, hard in the jaw, and Will's green eyes roll back in his head as he passes out. Al's face goes back to it's old cuddly-teddy-bear look as he crouches next to Will. He continuously taps Will's cheek, trying to get him to wake up. Will's eyes open, and he blinks, clearly dazed.

"Get him up." Eric greedily stares at Will's body. I get up, trying to avoid the tension, and I circle Al's name in tribute of his victory. "Next up—Molly and Christina!" Eric shouts as All pulls Will out of the square. I support Will by the waist and walk him out of the room, leaving everyone in Eric's uncomfortable care.


	5. Four-lorn ch 5

**Chapter Ten of Divergent, *finally* up. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy, or any of the characters**

* * *

Standing by the back door of the training room, I scan the fight pairs for today. I groan inwardly when I see Tris paired with Peter.

"Eric, are you sure these pairings are fair?" His superior sigh irks me.

"When is life _ever_ fair? Why should they get it fair?" He turns and faces me. Behind his cold, lifeless eyes, for just a split second, I see a pain arise, as though something terrible once happened to him. It is a pain, though he does a very good job covering it, seems to burst through his eyes like an overstuffed bag bursting at its seams. For a moment, I am almost able to pity him. Then the split second ends, and I zoom back out into real life. Eric is a lifeless jerk, and I shouldn't care. But I do. Or, at least, the Abnegation in me cares. But I chose Dauntless.

"These are the pairings, Four. If you don't like it, then feel free to leave." I nod quietly, my face souring as Tris and Al walk in.

"Still I don't want to do it again." Al shakes his head so fast it looks like it's going to fly off his thick torso.

"But you have to." Tris looks grim. She studies Al for a moment, and I begin to wonder if they are together. It's obvious that Al is perfectly smitten, but from my perspective, it looks like she's been simply brushing it off as friendship. The way she studies him causes a feeling to arise that I haven't felt in a very long time, and I have trouble placing it's name. I suddenly find the proper descriptive word. _Jealousy. _The word feels foreign on my tongue, and judging by Eric's stoic expression, it looks foreign on my face. Jealousy usually adorns Eric's metallic features.

"Oh no. Are they serious? They're really going to make _you_ fight _him_?" Eric's smugness grows with the rate of his tapping foot at Christina's comment.

"Maybe you can just take a few hits and pretend to go unconscious. No one would blame you." There goes that feeling again. I force it down my throat like an uncomfortable Abnegation dinner. I wonder what I would be doing right now, had I chosen Abnegation. Would I have still met Tris? In another world, would we be married someday? Would I hide my scars from her? Or would she just be a stranger on the street, who earns none but a small nod and brief wave, just another expressionless grey face? I don't bother to think about it. The thought makes me feel stiff. I blink quickly, trying to hide any evidence of emotion.

"You okay there, Stiff?" I realise that Peter and Tris are up, and he's already begun to taunt her. "You look like you're about to cry. I might go easy on you if you cry." My face bitters, and I feel my eyes lock with Tris's. I look down at my feet, trying not to show my utter hatred for Peter. I purse my lips. Eric's feet are only tapping faster, and I want to throttle him. "Come on, Stiff. Just one little tear. Maybe some begging." Now I want to throttle Peter as well. Tris looks like she wants to gag, and I wouldn't blame her if she did. She bends her leg to kick him, but he grabs her foot, and knocks her over. She doesn't fall.

"Stop playing with her. I don't have all day." I had nearly forgotten Eric was there. I avert my eyes as Peter punches her, right across the face. I have a sudden urge to protect Tris, but then I remember that she doesn't need protecting. She's a strong woman who can take care of herself, and I admire that. I will her to stand as Peter kicks her, right in the gut. He grabs her hair as she stands and punches her in the nose. I can tell it's broken. She attempts to shove him, but he punches her in the ribs as blood drips from her face. Tris looks dizzy and it hurts. My stomach lurches, and I know I need to leave before someone notices. I walk to the door as calmly as I can, trying to hide how sick this makes me feel.

…

I stop by the hospital later that day to check on Tris, but I don't go in. Sitting by her bed are her real friends. Will and Christina, and most unfortunately, Al. I've never really liked him. They stay a few minutes, and I can hear their laughter through the thin plaster walls. I smile inwardly at their happiness. I almost wish I could be a part of the happiness. But I can't. I never can.


	6. Four-lorn ch 6

**Hello dearies! Sorry I have been so lazy! It's been a crazy week :P**

**Here's my next chapter, a.k.a. Ch. 12 of Divergent in Four's POV!**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

Standing at the edge of the train tracks, I hear the initiates stumbling up behind me. I don't hear the familiar voice of Tris Prior. I can see the train coming down the tracks, and I worry that she won't make it. Just as the train horns are in earshot, I hear the patter of familiar feet behind me.

"What took you so long?" Will's voice is barely heard over the sound of the train horn.

"Stumpy Legs over here turned into an old lady overnight," Christina speaks.

"Oh shut up." I resist a snicker as Tris pipes in.

My face is about as close to the train as I can possibly get without disfiguring my face. I shift back and allow Will to hoist himself into the train car, offering no helping hand, just like I was taught. He hoists himself up with great difficulty, dragging his legs behind his heaving stomach. After he is in, I pull myself in smoothly. I poke my head out of the window, and I notice Al pull Tris into the next train car. Damn. I was looking forward to riding with her.

*#*#*

After an uncomfortable minute alone with Will, I hear bickering and I walk back to the next train car, Will in tow.

"Feeling okay there? Or are you a little… _Stiff_?" Molly and Drew laugh alongside Peter's pun, and Will darts out in front of me before I can stop him.

"We are all awed by your incredible wit," Will's voice speaks, dripping with sarcasm.

"Yeah, are you sure you don't belong with the Erudite, Peter? I hear they don't object to sissies." Christina joins right in the bashing, and before things get ugly, I interject from my vantage point of the doorway.

"Am I going to have to listen to your bickering all the way to the fence?" My comment seems to shut everyone up. After everyone is quiet (which takes around two seconds), I turn my back to everyone, sticking my torso out of the door that has been left ajar, and into the open air. The wind pushes my hair out of my face and presses my shirt to my chest. I smile at the feeling of peace, but they can't see that. I feel Tris's eyes on my backside, even though they leave, they always find their way back to me.

"What do you think is out there? I mean, beyond the fence." I barely catch Tris's words.

"A bunch of farms, I guess," Christina responds. Her comment doesn't trump Tris's curiosity.

"Yeah, but I mean… past the farms. What are we guarding the city from?"

"Monsters!" Christina's voice teasingly leaves my hearing range as I lose myself in the flying feeling, even though the ground is right under my feet.

*#*#*

Only the train's breaks reel me back into reality. I hop lightly off of the train car, pausing to shoot a sidelong glance at Tris. She doesn't see me. She wobbles over to the door, lowering herself cautiously onto the grass.

"Follow me." I speak quickly and quietly. I don't want to lose any initiates. "If you don't rank in the top five at the end of initiation, you will probably end up here," I reach the gate. "Once you are a fence guard, there is some potential for advancement, but not much. You may be able to go on patrols beyond Amity's farms, but-" Will cuts me off.

"Patrols for what purpose?" He looks genuinely curious, and despite my desire to sock him in the face for interrupting me, I'm no Eric.

"I suppose you'll discover that if you find yourself among them." I raise one shoulder. "_As_ I was saying. for the most part, those who guard the fence when they are young continue to guard the fence. If it comforts you, some of them insist that it isn't as bad as it seems."

Christina leans to whisper something in Tris's ear as Peter speaks up. "What rank were you?" I turn to look at Eric, and I realise he is asking me. I return his level look.

"I was first." I speak slowly and calmly, trying to tell him to shut up. He doesn't take the bait.

"And you chose to do _this_?" Peter's eyes go wide. "Why didn't you get a government job?" I sigh.

"I didn't want one." My voice goes flat. The training room is like my sanctuary. It makes me feel safe. I then proceed to continue to walk the initiates to the next gate. We stop at a truck and I start talking to the Dauntless guard, but something else catches my attention. Tris is talking to an Amity boy in the back of the truck. I frown for a moment and return to my conversation.

*#*#*

When Tris finishes her conversation with said Amity boy (the guard says his name is Robert), I step away from the fence where I was speaking to the guard and stop a foot away from Tris.

"I am worried that you have a knack for making unwise decisions." Tris crosses her arms defensively at my statement.

"It was a two minute conversation."

"I don't think a smaller time frame makes it any less wise." My eyebrows un-knit themselves, and I curiously stare at her face. Before I can stop myself, my fingertips are brushing her bruised eyelid. Her hand jerks back, yet I cannot seem to control mine. I tilt my head and sigh. "You know, if you could just learn to attack first, you might do better."

"Attack first? How will that help?" She looks confusedly at me, and I can't help but smile.

"You're fast. If you can get a few good hits in before they know what's going on, you could win." I shrug, and I let my hand finally leave her face.

"I'm surprised you know that, since you left halfway through my one and only fight." She sounds quiet and disappointed. I think a minute, trying to find the right words to voice my feeling.

"It wasn't something I wanted to watch," I say, my voice feels thick and blundering. I clear my throat. "Looks like the next train is here. Time to go, Tris."


	7. Four-lorn ch 7

**This is the equivalent of chapter 12 of Divergent! Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

Standing in shadows by the barrel of paint guns, I wait for the initiates to come out of their rooms. I see the Dauntless initiates run up, and Tris and Christina lead the transfers behind them. I take a small step back into the shadows as they grab their guns.

"Time estimate?" Eric's voice perturbs the darkness.

"Any miute now. How long is it going to take you to memorize the train schedule?" I sigh. I've known Eric for two years, and I know he never will.

"Why should I, when I have you to remind me of it?" Eric shoves me in the shoulder with his last comment, but I don't notice.

The train light comes around the side of the corner, and it covers my once hidden face with a blanket of light. I adjust the position of the gun on my shoulder and I move out of the light so it casts a shadow of my jaw. I leap first onto the train and I hear Tris's footsteps behind me. I hear her slip, and I know I should let her fall, but I don't. I reach out my hand, and she grips my forearm, sending a jolt of electricity down my arm, all the way through to my heart. As soon as she is upright, she lets go quickly and refuses to meet my eye. I sigh.

Once everyone is in, I begin to talk. "We'll be divided into two teams to play capture the flag. Each team will have an even mix of members, Dauntless-born initiates, and transfers. One team will get off first and find a place to hide their flag. Then the second team will get off and do the same." I grab the door for balance as the car reaches a turn. "This is a Dauntless tradition, so I suggest you take it seriously."

"What do we get if we win?" I hear the unidentified transfer's voice pipe up.

"Sounds like the kind of question someone not from Dauntless would ask." I raise my eyebrow, showing Eric that I am _indeed_ Dauntless. "You get to win, of course."

Eric smugly takes over from here. "Four and I will be your team captains. Lets divide up transfers first, shall we?" I nod, and I see Tris look disappointed.

"You go first," I say quietly.

Eric shrugs. "Edward."

I lean against the door frame and sigh with a nod. I scan the room, but I know already who I'm going to choose. "I want the Stiff." _Tris. Her name is Tris._

Everyone laughs at my choice, but Tris turns bright red. "Got something to prove?" Eric's smirk is already reappearing. "Or are you just picking the weak once so that if you lose, you'll have someone to blame it on."

I shrug. "Something like that. Your turn."

"Peter."

"Christina."

"Molly."

"Will." I bite my thumbnail.

"Al."

"Drew."

"Last one left is Myra. So she's with me." Eric sounds annoyed at this, but Edward looks pleased, and I can't help but smile. "Dauntless born initiates next." We list through the Dauntless-borns, but I'm not really paying attention to them. My eyes are on Tris. She appears to be figuring me out. About halfway through the Dauntless initiates, she gets a smug look on her face, and I throw her a nod. She knows my strategy.

"Your team can get off second," says Eric.

"Don't do me any favors," I reply with a smile. "You know I don't need them to win."

"No, I know that you'll lose no matter when you get off." Eric bites down on the metal rings around his lips. I resist the urge to shiver. "Take your scrawny team and get off first then."

My team stands up, and they begin to jump off the train. Molly shoves Tris off the train, but she sticks the landing anyways. I smile softly, proud of the team I chose, and proud of Tris for landing like a Dauntless.

"When your team won, where did you put the flag?" I realise that Marlene is talking to me.

"Telling you wouldn't really be in the spirit of the exercise, Marlene." I speak coolly, although I begin walking towards the carousel.

"Come on, Four," she whines. You know, I really hate when girls whine. But the only thing I hate more, is when girls I'm clearly not interested in try to flirt with me. She throws me a flirtatious smile that gives me the creeps and her hand begins to run down my shoulder and onto my biceps. I hope she's only joking, and I brush her hand off of me. I hear Tris snicker in the background, and I sigh, just a little bit of tension leaving my body.

"Navy Pier." I hear Uriah call out behind me. "My brother was on the winning team. They kept the flag at the carousel."

"Let's go there, then." I smile at Will's suggestion, picking up the pace. We walk across the bridge and towards the carousel. The silence in this place fills me with a longing peace. I look out behind the buildings and see the Ferris wheel. We reach the carousel and I pull the flag out of my pocket.

"In ten minutes, the other team will pick their location. I suggest you take this time to formulate a strategy. We may not be Erudite, but mental preparedness is one aspect of your Dauntless training. Arguably, it is the most important aspect." Will takes the flag from me.

"Some people should stay here and guard, and some people should go out and scout the other team's location." I sigh as Will begins to take charge.

"Yeah? You think?" Marlene takes the flag from Will. "Who put you in charge, transfer?" I hold utterly still as Will holds his ground.

"No one. But someone's got to do it."

"Maybe we should develop a more defensive strategy. Wait for them to come to us, then take them out," Christina suggests weakly.

"That's the sissy way out," Uriah speaks up, "I vote we all go out. Hide the flag well enough that they can't find it."

Everyone bursts out into conversation, and I sit down on the edge of the carousel. I look at the sky, and I take in a breath. Now would be the part where Amar sits down next to me and reassures me that I will like Dauntless. I wish he was here now to help me. Rather than Amar, I see Tris standing a foot away. She eyes me, then she closes her eyes in peril. I smile. The smile wipes off of my face as I see what Tris is about to do. I notice that she has the flag. She begins to climb.

"Tris." My voice feels low.

"Yes?" Her voice sounds strained from hanging onto the rungs.

"I came to find out what you think you're doing." I try to keep my voice calm.

"I'm seeking higher ground. I don't _think_ I'm doing anything." Her sassiness, while any other trainer would find it annoying, it makes me smile.

"All right. I'm coming." I've always made an effort to view her with respect. People treat her like a child because she's smaller, but she isn't a child anymore. She's perfectly capable of making her own decisions. But so am I, and that's why I'm choosing to climb up with her.

"I'll be fine," she tries to reassure me.

"Undoubtedly." The word escapes my lips with not a single trace of sarcasm. I begin to climb after her, going faster than her. "So tell me…," I speak quietly, the heights starting to get to me. "What do you think the purpose of this excersize is? The game, I mean, not the climbing." I see Tris stare down nervously at the ground and I force myself not to look.

"Learning about strategy. Teamwork, maybe."

"Teamwork," I repeat numbly. The panic in me gets stronger the higher we climb, and I let out a breathy laugh, hoping Tris doesn't catch the fear in my voice.

"Maybe not," she says, but I barely hear her. The blood rushes in my ears. "Teamwork doesn't seem to be a Dauntless priority." The wind picks up and I struggle to hold on.

"It's supposed to be a priority. It used to be." I suddenly realise how close I am to Tris. My fear of heights changes. I know what that fear feels like. It's a cold, stabbing fear that gets me in the night. I'm unable to move when I'm high up. This is different. I feel an adrenaline pumping in my veins, like I have to move faster to protect myself and the people around me. And that's when I realise it. It isn't the heights that's scaring me right now, although no doubt that's somewhere in my mind, it's Tris. I notice her almost miss the next rung, and I realise I'm distracting her too.

"Now tell me, what do you think learning strategy has to do with… bravery?" Tris appears to catch her focus.

"It… it prepares you to act. You learn strategy so you can use it- are you alright, Four?" I suppose she hears my heavy breathing.

"Are you _human_, Tris? Being up this high… It doesn't scare you at all?" She looks nervously over her shoulder, but then a confidence bides over her face. She knows she won't fall, and I really do admire that. A gust of wind brushes over her and pulls her away from me. I wrap my arm gently around her waist, the palm of my hand going just under the hem of her shirt, and I feel the electricity. I pull her back towards me and then I let go quickly.

There's something Eric doesn't understand. The Dauntless teach us to be strong and forceful, but there is something urgent and powerful about gentleness, about mercy. There is an honor in showing defeat.

"You okay?" I gently ask Tris, as she appears short of breath.

"Yes." Her voice sounds strained and wobbly.

We reach the top and she takes a seat, leaving me a little bit of room. Her legs dangle over the edge, and I long to pull her back, but I don't. I keep my legs positioned strategically underneath me, panting at the top, trying not to look down.

"You're afraid of heights. How do you survive in the Dauntless compound?" I sigh. I knew she'd figure it out eventually.

"I ignore my fear. When I make decisions, I pretend it doesn't exist." I notice Tris staring at me. She stares for a long time, looking astounded. "What?" I notice my voice has gone quiet. So has hers.

"Nothing." She sighs. "We're not high enough."

"For God's sake, Stiff."

"You don't have to follow me."

"Yes I do." I hear her sigh, and then she smiles. She looks down at where I used to be sitting, and I hear her gasp in fear. I grab a bar with each hand, not looking down, and I pull myself up. I smile back at her. We continue to climb.

"See that?" I see Tris pointing at the light on the ground. My face is so close to hers if I leaned in any further my nose would be in her hair. I breathe out softly, and I see her shiver.

"Yeah." I smile softly. She helped me get up here.

"It's coming from the park at the end of the pier. Figures. It's surrounded by open space, but the trees provide some camouflage. Obviously not enough." She looks at me for a second, then remembers what she's doing.

"Okay. Um," she clears her throat. "Start climbing down. I'll follow you." We climb in silence. After a moment, I hear her scream my name. "Four!" I feel the panic that she had banished rise again in my throat. The bar she had been holding onto broke.

"Hold on! Just hold on, I have an idea." I try to keep my voice calm for her sake, but I know she can hear my panic. I know she won't last much longer.

"Four!" She scrams again, but I can barely hear her. The bar she's holding shudders, and the wheel begins to move. As she gets to the bottom, she lets go. I walk next to her. I wrap my hands around her wrists, prying them from her eyes. I enclose one of her hands in two of mine.

"You all right?" My voice feels unsteady. I press our hands together.

"Yeah."

I start to laugh, and Tris joins in.

"You could have told me that the Ferris wheel still worked. We wouldn't have had to climb in the first place."

I sigh. "I would have, if I had know. I couldn't just let you hang there, so I took a risk. come on, time to get their flag." I hesitate a moment, and then I take Tris's arm, my fingertips lightly caressing the inside of her elbow. We run up to Christina and three others that I can't see in the dark.

"Where'd the others go?" I ask.

"Did you guys turn on the wheel? What the hell are you thinking? You might as well have just shouted 'Here we are! come and get us!'" The girl in the dark shakes her head. "If I lose again this year, the shame will be unbearable. Three years in a row?" I sigh with a smile.

"The wheel doesn't matter. We know where they are." I say, my voice growing stronger.

"We?" Christina looks from me to Tris.

"Yes, while the rest of you were twiddling your thumbs, Tris climbed the Ferris wheel to look for the other team," I say.

"What do we do now, then?" Another Dauntless in the dark asks. I look at Tris, admiration growing in my eyes. She lights up with an idea.

"Split in half," she says. "Four of us go to the right side of the pier, three to the left. The other team is in the park at the end of the pier, so the group of four will charge the as the group of three sneaks behind the other team to get the flag." I beam in excitement at Tris's idea.

"Sounds good," says the Dauntless-born girl, clapping her hands. "Lets get this night over with, shall we?"

Christina, Tris, and Uriah take the group of three, while the other three Dauntless borns and me go for the charge. We go in as planned, and the other team shoots us down, but I see Tris and Christina behind them, and Eric and his team seem unaware of us. I see Christina grab it, and Tris looks disappointed, but that's okay. She was the real hero today. I stand up, and our team circles and we all whoop and yell. Christina holds the flag high, and we all cluster together. I find Tris. "Well done," I say quietly.

* * *

**Oh sorry, two more things. First, this is the longest chapter I have ever written, somewhere around 2,500 words, so yay!**

**Second, the next chapter in the actual book of Divergent is the knife throwing scene, and since the lovely Veronica Roth already wrote that in Four's POV, I'm going to skip it. I don't want to even attempt to compare with her work, so I will be moving on straight to Chapter 14 of Divergent!**

**-Laura (Laura013)**


	8. Four-lorn ch 8

**Hey guys, sorry about how utterly short this chapter is in comparison to the last one (the last one was 2,500 words, this one is only 500), it's just that this was the chapter where Peter and Drew find Tris naked in the dormitory, and that took up the better part of the chapter, and since Four wasn't there, I couldn't write about it. The next chapter is going to be out either later today or tomorrow (since I'm going to see Catching Fire tonight, it may not be until tomorrow, sorry.)**

**Also, this is the equivalent of chapter 14 (chapter 13 was the knife throwing scene, and as I said in my last chapter, I'm skipping that scene because I don't want to compete with Veronica Roth's brilliant work, because I will come nowhere close) of the actual Divergent series**

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

Writing the names on the whiteboard, I hear Tris enter the room.

"Hey, where were you this morning?" I hear Christina ask her. I turn my head ever so slightly to hear better, because I had been hoping to see Tris this morning as well.

"I got held up." Her voice sounds shaky, and I desire to go and ask, but I control my actions. I continue writing the names.

"You okay, Tris? You look a little…" I scowl inwardly as Al is present as the friend Tris needs. I never really liked Al, and I know I've already said that, but I'll say it again.

"A little what?" Tris snaps. God, something bad must've happened to her to wind her up like this.

"On edge," Al says nervously, taking a step back. I chuckle to myself.

Will and Myra take a step towards each other on the mat. I lean back and yawn. Myra doesn't stand a chance against Will. She's too nice for Dauntless. I think she only came here for Edward. I wonder if I'd ever have switched factions like that for someone. Well, I didn't. As expected, Will takes Myra out. Next up is Al and Christina. Al goes out fast and painless, and I feel the breath of Eric's sigh on my neck, even though he's on the other side of the room.

Third up is Edward and Peter. I lean in anxiously. This fight is going to be interesting, and Eric and I have had bets on them since the first day, just waiting until they would fight. Eric nods his head at me. I look at Edward as he throws a punch and I know that it's Peter who doesn't stand a chance. Edward takes Peter out, and I mimic taking money from Eric, which earns me a trademark scowl.

Now Eric leans forward intensely. At first I frown, then I realise that Tris is about to fight. Eric looks at me with a gleam in his eyes, as if to say, _"Your girl doesn't stand a chance."_ I send a glare his way before averting my eyes. I'll be completely honest, I don't want to see Tris get hurt. I only open them to the injured cries of Molly. At first, my shock overwhelms me. _She won. She actually won._ I sigh in relief. Then I see that she's still fighting. Molly's already down but Tris is still kicking. I run to the mat and pull Tris away.

"You won. Stop." She takes in a breath, and I heave out the next words. "I think you should leave. Take a walk."

"I'm fine," she says. "I'm fine now." I take in a small breath. _No, Tris. No you aren't._


	9. Four-lorn ch 9

**Hello everyone! Second chapter of today, as promised. Sorry this one is so short as well, and that I had to go a teeny bit off book here, but like not so off story that it's AU, just I kind of delved into Four's thoughts a bit here, otherwise the story would've been like 200 words and that would've been lame. I took a risk so uh tell me how it is! **

**Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

I follow Eric quietly into the initiate dormitory.

"Attention!" he calls. "I want to give you some advice about today." I frown. _What's so special about today?_ Then I remember. It's visiting day. A.K.A., hide-where-Marcus-can't-find-me day. "If by some miracle your families do come to visit you, which I doubt, it is best not so seem too attached. That will make it easier for you and easier for them. We also take the phrase 'faction before blood' very seriously here. Attachment to your family suggests you aren't entirely pleased with your faction, which would be _shameful_. Understand?" I see everyone nod, as they walk out of the dorms.

"I may have underestimated you, Stiff. You did well yesterday." I frown at Eric's comment to Tris. I feel almost sorry. If Eric thinks she did okay, then she most certainly was too violent.

"Thank you," she whispers. I smile as she takes off. I begin to pace the hallways, waiting for the inevitable. I remember my first visiting day.

_"Has anyone seen my son, Tobias?" Marcus's voice rang through the pit at it's standard loud volume._

_"Who the hell is Tobias?" I sigh my relief at Amar's comment, yet I take in a breath as I hear Marcus's next words._

_"Take me to my son or I swear I'll have you killed."_

_"I'm sorry, Mr. Eaton. I don't know where he is."_

_"Can someone tell me where my goddamn son is?" I quivered underneath the waterfall bridge, praying to any deity out there that he wouldn't find me._

_"Who the hell is Tobias?" I hear Eric yell._

_"My son! The Abnegation kid. Yay tall, dark hair, shaky little thing."_

_"You mean Four?"_

_"What?"_

_"I don't know any Tobias, but that sounds a hell of a lot like Four, except without the shakiness."_

_"Okay then, where is Four?" I sigh, putting my head in my hands. Come on, Eric, please don't tell him._

_"I don't know, man. Sorry." I sigh in relief as I hear Marcus storm out of the Dauntless Pit._

_"Thank you, Eric."_

"Hello. My name is Natalie." I jump out of my own thoughts at none other than Natalie Prior stands in front of me. I take in a nervous breath. _Please don't recognize me, please don't recognize me._ What was I thinking? Of course she'll recognize me. She's only had me and my father over a million times for dinner after my mom died.

"Four. It's nice to meet you." I shake her hand stiffly.

"Four," she repeats, smiling. "Is that a nickname."

"Yes." I see Tris look curiously at me, but I won't tell her my real name. Not yet. "Your daughter is doing well here. I've been overseeing her training." I see Tris shoot me a look and I look at her apologetically. I didn't mean to scare her with the knives, I was just helping.

"That's good to hear. I know a few things about Dauntless initiation, and I was worried about her." Was Natalie Prior Dauntless?

"You shouldn't worry." I eye Tris's face, and she blushes as my eyes reach her lips.

"You look familiar for some reason, Four." I feel a shot of fear rise up my body.

"I can't imagine why," I reply, feeling my voice go stiff. "I don't make a habit of associating with the Abnegation." Luckily, Natalie Prior laughs.

"Few people do, these days. I don't take it personally." I relax as she responds.

"Well, I'll leave you to your reunion." I walk down the bridge, but I pause underneath them and hear one comment.

"Is he always like that?"

"Worse."

I sigh in sadness. I don't want to be that uptight trainer. I want to be her friend. At least.


	10. Four-lorn ch 10

**Hello! Thank you so much for 30 followers! I have, unfortunately, returned your kindness with laziness, and I haven't updated for 3 days :( I'm sorry! I hope you enjoy this next update!**

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 16**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

"There you are!" I hear Tris exclaim over the speaker in the video control room. Even though I'm training, Max still has me work extra hours. "Your parents were looking for you. Did they find you?" I see that Tris is talking to Al, and I immediately feel a stab of jealousy. I see him shake his head softly as Tris sits down next to him. _Oh, Tris, no. No, Tris,_ I think to myself. "You didn't want to see them?" she asks him.

"Didn't want them to ask how I was doing," he says nervously. "I'd have to tell them, and they would know if I was lying." At the downward look of his face I almost feel guilty that I hated him so much. He's just a… well for lack of a better analogy he's a broken teddy bear in a foreign land. I can almost feel his pain.

"What's wrong with how you're doing?" I can tell Tris understands him, and I feel as though I suddenly begin to understand their relationship. He likes her, and she wants to help him. I can almost admire that.

"I've lost every fight since the one with Will. I'm not doing well."

"By choice, though. Couldn't you tell them that, too?" Tris's voice sounds filled with worry.

"Dad always wanted me to come here. I mean, they say they wanted me to stay in Candor, but that's only because that's what they're supposed to say. They've always admired the Dauntless, both of them. They wouldn't understand if I tried to explain it to them."

"Oh," Tris taps her fingers against her knee. "Is that why you chose Dauntless? Because of your parents?"

Al shakes his head. "No. I guess it was because… I think it's important to protect people. To stand up for people. Like you did for me. That's what the Dauntless are supposed to do, right? That's what courage is. Not… hurting people for no reason." My lips slightly part in surprise. I hadn't realized how wise Al was.

"Maybe it will be better once initiation is over." _No, Tris. No it won't._

"Too bad I might come in last," Al says. "I guess we'll see tonight." Tris and Al sit side by side for a bit, watching everyone in the Pit. I wish I could say Al wasn't come in last, but I can't. He doesn't stand a chance in Dauntless. I think about switching the names, but Eric would notice that something was wrong and he would have my head mounted on his front door.

"I feel braver when I'm around you, you know," he says, and I start to feel a bit queasy. "Like I could actually fit in here, the same way you do." My eyes widen and I feel my lunch begin to rise in my stomach as Al slides his arm around Tris's shoulder.

"No," I whisper, quiet enough that George, the other video monitor, doesn't hear me.

"You okay, man?" George asks. I nod softly.

"Yeah," I lie. "Fine." Then I turn my attention back to the video camera. I see Tris lean forward so that Al's arm falls off her shoulder. A bit of the nervous breath I was holding escapes, but I still sit stiffly clenched, every muscle in my body rigid, my eyes fixed on the camera and my ears tuned to the sound of their voices in my headset.

"Tris, I…" he says. "Um… sorry. I wasn't trying to… um. Sorry." He stiffens, and I completely let out my breath. I relax back in my seat.

"I should go," Tris says, sounding embarrassed. He nods at her sheepishly. "You going to be okay? I mean… because of your parents. Not because…" Her voice trails off as Al nods.

"Oh. Yeah. I'll see you later, Tris." Tris nods and walks out the door.

I expect her to continue walking, but a few steps out of the door, she stops. Her head lifts ever so slightly, and she smiles. I feel the life drain out of me in one breath. "I gotta go, George." I throw down my headphones and walk out of the control room in despair.

* * *

I stand in the Dauntless dormitory, a piece of chalk still hanging in my hands, as I wait for the initiates to come back from dinner. Sure enough, one by one, they pile in.

"For those of you who just came in," I say, "I'm explaining how the ranks are determined. After the first round of fights, we rank you according to your skill level. The number of points you earn depends on your skill level and the skill level of the person you beat. You earn more points for improving and more points for beating someone of a high skill level. I don't reward praying on the weak. That is cowardice." My eyes linger on Peter. "If you have a high rank, you lose points for losing to a low-ranked opponent."

I hear Molly grumble, and I let out a satisfied breath.

"Stage two of training is weighted more heavily than stage one, because it is more closely tied to overcoming cowardice. That said, it is extremely difficult to rank high at the end of initiation if you rank low in stage one." My eyes float on Tris. She looks nervous. Her eyes shoot up to mine, and then back down. I stifle a smile. "We will announce the cuts tomorrow. The fact that you are transfers and the Dauntless-born initiates are not will not be taken into consideration. Four of you could be factionless and none of them. Or four ofthem could be factionless and none of you. Or any combination thereof. That said, here are your ranks." I display the board.

The rankings go as follows:

1. Edward

As expected.

2. Peter

I was annoyed about that, but Eric insisted that he was doing good.

3. Will

4. Christina

5. Molly

I was tempted to move Tris ahead of Molly, but I knew she needed to be where she earned her spot.

6. Tris

She earned it.

7. Drew

8. Al

At least he isn't last. It was the least I could do.

9. Myra

"What?" demands Molly. "I beat her! I beat her in _minutes_, and she's ranked _above_ me?"

"Yeah," Christina says smugly, "And?"

"If you intend to secure yourself a high rank, I suggest you don't make a habit of losing to low-ranked opponents." I hope Tris doesn't think I meant her with my comment, I really was referring to Myra, but that isn't how Molly takes it.

"You," she says, looking straight at Tris. "_You _are going to pay for this." I stiffen, but hold myself in decorum.

"Look at you. Number six," Will says, grinning.

"Still might not have been good enough," Tris says glumly. _Oh, Tris. It was good enough, all right._

"It will be, don't worry," Will says. "We should celebrate.

"Well let's go, then," says Christina. I watch them walk off in the distance, and I can honestly say that I have never, ever felt so forlorn.


	11. Four-lorn ch 11

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 18 (I had to skip 17 because Four LITERALLY wasn't even present the whole chapter)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

"Lynn," I say into the darkness. It's her turn to go into the simulation. Lynn comes in, and I hook her up to the machine, hearing the familiar rattle of the monitors on the wall. I inject her with the simulation, no questions asked. She comes to after about 5 minutes.

"Peter," I call. I repeat my actions with Peter. I barely pay attention to his moany questions. I keep going with people, over and over, until I get to Tris.

"Come on, Tris," I say softly. I touch her shoulder, guiding her inside, trying to ignore the fact that Drew just tripped her. "Sit," I say. I squeeze Tris's arm and push her forward.

"What's the simulation?" She asks, nervous.

"Ever hear the phrase 'face your fears'? We're taking that literally. The simulation will teach you to control you emotions in the midst of a frightening situation."

"Do you ever administer the aptitude tests?" She sounds genuinely curious, but the question throws me.

"No," I say, stiffening. "I avoid Stiffs as much as possible."

"Why?" she asks me.

"Do you ask me that because you think I'll actually answer?"

"Why do you say vague things if you don't want to be asked about them?"

I brush her neck softly with my fingers, trying to find the right place to insert the needle. This obviously isn't it, as she tenses quickly.

"An injection?" She swallows some air as she asks me.

"We have a more advanced version of the simulation here. A different serum, no wires or electrodes for you."

"How does it work without wires?"

"Well _I_ have wires, so I can see what's going on. But for you, there's a tiny transmitter in the serum that sends data to the computer." I turn her arm over gently, easing the tip of the needle into the skin on the side of her neck.

"The serum will go into effect in sixty seconds," I say softly, trying to calm her down as much as I can, "This simulation is different from the aptitude test. In addition to containing the transmitter, the serum stimulates the amygdala, which is the part of the brain involved in processing negative emotions—like fear—and then induces a hallucination. The brain's electrical activity is then transmitted to our computer, which then translates your hallucination into a simulated image that I can see and monitor. I will then forward the recording to Dauntless administrators. You stay in the hallucination until you calm down—that is, lower your heart rate and control your breathing." I can tell she has trouble following my words.

"Be brave, Tris," I whisper. "The first time is always the hardest."

I see Tris in a field of dry grass that is waist high for her. She hears a fluttering. I hear it too. Shadows swoop over her face. A large bird lands on her shoulder, pricking her with it's talons. I want so badly to stop watching, but I can't. I have to keep a record and see if she really is… well if she really is _Divergent_. There. I said it. Tris hits the crow with her fist and attempts to run, but she can't. I hear her scream and sob and I cringe, it hurts me too. I shiver in my seat, trying not to move. The Dauntless are watching me on their little cameras. I run my hands through my hair

"Help!" she screams. "Help!" _You stay in the hallucination until you can calm down, Tris. Calm down._ I will her to calm down, but she isn't.

"Help," she croaks. "Help." _Be brave, Tris._ Suddenly, something in her changes. She closes her eyes and sobs one final time until the screen goes back. She sobs into her knees. I lay my hand softly on her shoulder.

"Don't touch me!" She flings my arm back.

"It's over," I say, awkwardly stroking her hair. "Tris." She continues to rock back and forth in the metal chair. "Tris, I'm going to take you back to the dorms, okay?"

"No!" she snaps. "They can't see me… not like this…" I sigh.

"Oh, calm down." I roll my eyes. "I'll take you out the back door."

"I don't need you to…" Her voice trails off.

"Nonsense." I grab her arm, feeling the familiar tug of my heart that I continually ignore.

"Why did you do that to me? What was the point of that, huh? I wasn't aware when I chose Dauntless, I was signing up for weeks of torture!"

"Did you think overcoming cowardice would be easy?" I ask calmly.

"This isn't overcoming cowardice! Cowardice is how you decide to be in real life, and in real life, I am not getting pecked to death by crows, Four!" She puts her head in her hands and sobs. I don't interrupt her. I just stand there, allowing her to cry.

"I want to go home," she says weakly.

"Learning how to think in the midst of fear is a lesson that everyone, even your Stiff family, needs to learn. That's what we're trying to teach you. If you can't learn it, you'll need to get the hell out of here, because we won't want you."

"I'm _trying_," her lower lip trembles. "But I failed. I'm failing."

I sigh. "How long do you think you spent in that hallucination, Tris?"

"I don't know. A half hour?"

"Three minutes. You got out three times faster than the other initiates. Whatever you are, you're not a failure." I smile, just a tiny bit. "Tomorrow you'll be better at this. You'll see."

"Tomorrow?"

I touch my fingers gently to her back, and I feel the same electricity.

"What was your first hallucination?" She asks innocently.

I try to play it off casually. "It wasn't a 'what' so much as a 'who.' It's not important."

"And are you over that fear now?"

"Not yet. I may never be."

"So they don't go away?"

"Sometimes they do. And sometimes new fears replace them." I hook my thumbs through my belt loops. "But becoming fearless isn't the point. That's impossible. It's learning how to control your fear, and how to be free from it, _that's_ the point." Tris nods softly.

"Anyway, your fears are rarely what they appear to be in the simulation," I add.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, are you really afraid of crows? When you see one, do you run away screaming?"

"No, I guess not." She takes a step towards me, and I try not to noticeably shiver. I can almost feel the electricity from here. She leans in, almost feeling the electricity.

"So what am I really afraid of?" she whispers.

"I don't know," I say. "Only you can know." She nods slowly.

"I didn't know becoming Dauntless would be this difficult."

"It wasn't always like this, I'm told," I say, lifting a shoulder. "Being Dauntless, I mean."

"What changed?"

"The leadership. The person who controls training sets the standard of Dauntless behavior. Six years ago Max and the other leaders changed the training methods to make them more competitive and more brutal, said ti was supposed to test people's strength. And that changed the priorities of Dauntless as a whole. Bet you can't guess who the leaders' new protégé is."

"So if you were ranked first in your initiate class, what was Eric's rank?"

"Second."

"So he was their second choice for leadership. And you were their first."

"What makes you say that?" I'm not saying she's wrong, just that it's surprising how she got there that quickly

"The way Eric was acting at dinner the first night. Jealous, even though he has what he wants."

I don't contradict her. She's right.

"Do I look like I've been crying?" She asks. I lean in close. We would be breathing the same air if I wasn't holding my breath.

"No, Tris," I smile. "You look tough as nails."


	12. Four-lorn ch 12

**A/N: Hi everyone! Sorry I haven't posted in a while, I left my computer alone for the Thanksgiving weekend, so I didn't post anything :(**

**Also, this chapter was so short in the actual book, and Four was barely in it, so I wrote a little extra scene to make it more than 300 words :P Tell me what you think in reviews!**

**Chapter of (the actual book) Divergent: 19**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

With my friends around me, alcohol in my veins, and the beautiful (if not horrifying) view of the chasm, it is almost enough to forget about the problems of everyday life. I find myself laughing so hard I have to clutch at the railing for balance, which I don't do often. My thoughts feel sluggish in my head, which, while after one or two drinks would make me feel uncomfortable, but now I embrace the lack of adult understanding of life. The thoughts in my brain go all happy when I see a group of transfer initiates walking by me, and I notice especially that Tris is one of them. She looks absolutely gorgeous.

"Tris," I call out, before I realise that my brain and mouth have been conspiring against me. Well, it's too late to go back now. I get up from my very comfortable position on the rail and I walk over to her. "You look different," I choke out.

"So do you," she says calmly. "What are you doing?"

"Flirting with death," I laugh. "Drinking near the chasm. Probably not a good idea."

"No, it isn't," she says quietly. She looks unsettled.

"Didn't know you had a tattoo," I say, looking at her collarbone. Sipping my bottle of beer, I prepare my next answer. "Right. The _crows_." I glance at my friends, who are still talking. "I'd ask you to hand out with us, but you're not supposed to see me this way."

Tris eyes the bottle in my hand. "What way? Drunk?"

"Yeah…well, no," I say. "Real, I guess," my voice softens.

"I'll pretend I didn't," she says. Was that a hint of melancholy in her voice? Or am I just drunk?

"Nice of you," I say. Before I can change my mind, I bend down, pressing my lips to her year. "You look good, Tris," I whisper. I see her cheeks burn, and I can hear her heart leaping like mine. I immediately realise what I say, and I make it look like I'm drunk. Shame. She'll think I don't mean it.

Tris lets out a stiffened laugh. "Of course," she says glumly. Glumly! I throw her a wink, just because I can. Tris waves at me as Al carries her away.

*#*#*

Waking up the morning after a night out is like waking up in Hell. Everything burns. I run my fingers through my hair and look around me. Luckily, I made it to my apartment safely enough. I don't appear to have destroyed the place. Good. I did better than last time. I get up from my bed and fill a glass with water from my sink, simply to ease my burning throat. It's about halfway through the glass that I freeze.

Oh God.

Tris.

I talked to Tris! I told her she looked good! I _winked_ at her! I stand in the same spot in my little kitchenette with the now-empty water glass still poised and pressed to my lips, in my boxers, until I hear a knock on my door.

"You alive in there, Four?" I hear a voice outside the door.

I grunt loudly.

"I'll take that as a yes," the voice continues.

"Goddamnit Zeke, be quiet!" I call.

"Hey, sorry, man! Just letting you know lunch is in 15," Zeke says.

"Okay, thanks," I respond. I hear Zeke's footsteps, letting me know he left my door.

I run to my room, grabbing a black t-shirt and jeans and throw them on as fast as I can. I jab a toothbrush between my lips as I go. I slip on my sneakers, grabbing my keys and throwing my toothbrush in the sink from the door as I lock up. I run down to the lunch hall.

When I arrive, I scan the room for Tris. My head pounds and my throat aches, and I can't seem to concentrate enough to look. I shake my head and squint, but I can't seem to make her out. I sit down next to Zeke and eat my lunch in silence.

"Hey, man, is something wrong?" Zeke prods my shoulder with the end of his fork. I snatch it from his hand and stick it in his water glass. "Whoa, there, Mr. Grumpy. Seriously, Four, what's wrong?"

"Don't poke me," I say stiffly.

"What happened to Mr. Fun Guy last night?" Zeke asks.

"He doesn't exist."

"Oh."

Just then, Tris, Christina, Will, and Al walk in the room. My eyes meet with Tris's, and I expect hatred, but that isn't what I receive. What I receive is so much worse. Hate and love are so close that it is easy to mistake one another. Easy to change one another. But there is no mistaking this. The look in Tris Prior's eyes is indifferent.


	13. Four-lorn ch 13

**A/N: Sorry about the length of this chapter, it was sort of a filler :P the next one ****_should_**** be longer, but no promises :P**

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 20**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

"It's just a simulation, Tris," I whisper quietly. Tris breathes harder and harder as she sinks slowly into the chair. Taking a breath, I insert the needle in her neck.

I see Tris in a glass box on the Pit floor. The initiates surround her. Her hand finds its way to her reflection in the glass. I feel her heartbeat rise through the machine. Then I take in a breath. I see myself. Simulation me points at Tris's feet with a smirk. I feel the need to slap myself. The water begins to rise to her ankles.

"Hey!" she calls. "Let me out of here!"

The water slides up her calves. She pounds on the glass.

"Get me out of here!" Christina and Peter share a thought and laugh at Tris. The water covers her thighs. She pounds the glass. The water rises past her chest.

"Help!" she screams. "Please! Please help!" I want so badly to end the simulation, but I don't. She floats gracefully to the top, and for a bad moment, I fear that she's asphyxiating, but instead she gulps in air from the last inch.

_Don't panic, Tris._

She thrashes in the water, pounding and kicking and screaming. Her next thought fills me with chills.

_The simulation is all in your head,_ she thinks to herself. She taps her finger against the glass and it shatters.

_Divergent._

She gasps for air and sits up in the room. I stare at her.

"What?" she asks.

"How did you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Crack the glass," my voice is ghastly low.

"I don't know," she whispers.

I offer Tris my hand, helping her up. I grab her by the elbow and half lead-half drag her out of the room. We walk quickly down the hallway. She stops, pulling her arm back.

"What?" she demands. I take a breath. It's now or never.

"You're Divergent," I reply. My voice is fast and low. I can almost feel the fear radiating off of her. I see her attempt to act casual. She leans back, taking in a gulp of air.

"What's Divergent?"

"Don't play stupid," I say quickly. "I suspected it last time, but this time it's obvious. You manipulated the simulation; you're Divergent. I'll delete the footage, but unless you want to wind up _dead_ at the bottom of the chasm," just like Amar, "you'll figure out how to hide it during the simulations! Now, if you'll excuse me."

I storm back into the simulation room, leaving Tris in the hallway.

#*#*#

Marcus. Evelyn. Amar. My baby sister who never got to see the light of day. The ever-growing list of ghosts that I knew that will always haunt me. Am I really ready to add to that list? Yes, I like Tris. Yes, I would protect her with my life because honestly, I have no one else to give my life for.

I've grown used to loneliness. There's never been anyone to trust for me before, and Tris is like the wrench that has been thrown in the dynamic of my life. But sometimes turning a corner can be good. Sometimes, finding someone to love can be important.

_So what am I waiting for?_

I just don't know if I'm ready.

_What is there to know? You like her, she likes you…_

Does she like me?

I suppose that's what I'm waiting for. Logic and emotion battle it out inside of my head, and I begin to lose track of which is which. I suppose, in the end, that I'll wait for Tris, although I honestly don't know what I'm waiting for.


	14. Four-lorn ch 14

**A/N: That was ridiculously fun to write :P Finally, some Trobias (or Fourtris or whatever you choose to call it) romance. Took a while :P Enjoy!**

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 21**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

"I know the simulation isn't real," Tris says to me. She's in the simulation as we speak.

"You don't have to explain it to me," I reply softly. "You love your family. You don't want to shoot them. Not the most unreasonable thing in the world." I hear her sigh, and I sigh myself.

"In the simulation is the only time I get to see them. I miss them. You ever just…miss your family?"

"No," I say, after a while. "I don't. But that's unusual."

_You have to tell her someday. Why not now?_

Because I'm not ready.

_Not ready for what?_

I let the question hang in the air. The question I was not able to answer four days ago. The question I was not able to answer the day she came. The question I am not able to answer now.

#*#*#

Walking down to the video control room, I feel a small smile growing on my face. Eric informed me of who was in what spot. And Tris was first.

"What's going on?" I hear Tris whisper.

"Rankings for stage two," Will responds.

"I thought there weren't any cuts after stage two," she hisses.

"There aren't. It's just a progress report, sort of."

Then Eric reveals the board.

The silence in the room is mesmerizing. The first words are Will's.

"Nice job, Tris," he truly sounds happy for her. Peter, on the other hand, sounds anything _but_ happy.

"I will not be outranked by a Stiff," he hisses. "How did you do it, huh? How the hell did you do it?" He pushes Tris against the wall, but Will is closer. He pulls Peter off of her.

"Leave her alone. Only a coward bullies a little girl."

"A little girl? Are you blind, or just stupid? She's going to edge you out of the rankings and out of _Dauntless_, and you're going to get _nothing_, all because she knows how to manipulate people and you don't. So when you realize that she's out to ruin us all, you let me know."

Peter storms out of the room angrily. Molly and Drew follow him, looking disgusted.

"Thanks," Tris says gratefully to Will.

"Is he right? Will asks quietly. "Are you trying to manipulate us?"

"How on earth would I do that?" Tris scowls. "I'm just doing the best I can, like anyone else."

"I don't know. By acting weak so we pity you? And then acting tough to psyche us out?" He shrugs ever so slightly, and I clench my fists, earning a curious look from George.

"Hey man, you okay?" George stares at me, now.

I nod softly at George.

"You know, you spend an awful lot of time watching that dormitory room. Why?"

"Does it matter?" I glare at George, and he silences himself. I notice Tris and Al alone in the room when I look back.

"Are you alright?" Tris asks Al.

"Sure," he says nonchalantly.

"It's not over," Tris says hopefully. "You can improve your rank if you…" Her voice trails off.

"See?" he says. "It's not that simple."

"I know it's not," she says.

"I don't think you do. For you it's easy. All of this is easy." He sounds angry.

"That's not true," Tris says quietly.

"Yeah, it is." He closes his eyes. "You aren't helping me by pretending it isn't. I don't—I'm not sure you can help me at all."

I decide I don't want to watch Tris comfort Al anymore, and I switch the feed.

#*#*#

As I walk out of the video control room, I notice Zeke and Shauna walking.

"Hey! Zeke! Can I join you?"

Zeke looks at me, his face somber. "I don't know, can you?"

I frown at him, and his dull eyes stare back at me. Then his face bursts into a smile, accompanied by Shauna's fits of laughter.

"I'm just kidding man, come on! We're going to watch Lynn shoot a muffin off of Marlene's head."

"Okay, cool."

We walk down the hallway for a bit to the target room, and I see Tris sitting with Uriah. A stab of jealousy shoots up my side. It's _Uriah_. Why do I feel like this?

"I thought I heard something in here," I joke.

"Turns out it's my idiot brother," Zeke carries on. "You're not supposed to be in here after hours. Careful, or Four will tell Eric, and then you'll be as good as scalped."

Uriah wrinkles his nose. Lynn eyes me suspiciously.

"You wouldn't tell Eric," she says, phrasing it like a question but not ending on a high octave.

"No, I wouldn't," I say. Tris begins to walk behind me, and I rest my hand on her back, my palm pressing between my shoulder blades. I feel her shiver and I bear back a smile. I feel the same shiver, along with the familiar jolt. Before I can stop myself, I open my mouth. "Wait a second."

Tris stops, and while the others continue on, she eyes me curiously. I feel the hairs on the back of my neck stand up at her gaze.

"You belong here, you know that? You belong with us. It'll be over soon, so just hold on, okay?" It's almost like a warning to myself, rather than the girl in front of me. I scratch behind my ear, lifting my elbow and staring at it. I take a half stagger forward and adjust the position of my jaw, trying to hide the embarrassment in my eyes.

Tris stares at me, trying to decide what to do next. I can hear her heartbeat quickening as she makes her next move. She stares up at me, a smile forming on her face, and I stare down at her, a smile forming on mine. I can feel the tension of her body against mine, the electric tension running through my veins compares to lightning striking the ocean.

She steps on her toes and slides her hand in mine. The touch of her skin sends a flow of blood burning like acid through my veins, straight to my heart. I can't breathe. We stay like this for a minute, and then quickly, and with a small smile, she pulls her hand from mine and runs after Uriah.

The minute is without a doubt the shortest, longest, and best minute of my life.

I stand in the hallway for a long while. Then, a smile adorning my face, I begin to walk home. That's when I hear the thumping from the dormitory. I stop cold in my tracks. It sounds like Tris.

I burst out of the hallway and find Peter and Drew beating Tris. She's screaming and squirming as they hold her to the rails. I lift them off of her, one by one, and Peter runs away as fast as he can as I take my fists to Drew's face. I beat him until I can't feel my fist, and then he runs.

"Four," Tris croaks. I run to the rails, and I wrap my arms tight around her. I pull her over the rails and hold her close to me. She buries her face in my shoulder and blacks out.


	15. Four-lorn ch 15

**A/N: Okay, SECOND post for tonight :) Enjoy! More coming soon :)**

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 22**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

I wash the blood off of my knuckles in the infirmary sink, ignoring the pain in the crook of my lip. I refuse to leave the room, reluctant to be this far away from Tris. My neck still tingled from where her cheek brushed against it.

"Your hands," I hear her croak.

"My hands are none of your concern," I reply, surprised to see her conscious. I rest my knee on the mattress, slipping the ice pack under her head and leaning over her. I feel a jolt flow through my face, and I realize that Tris's hand is touching my lip. I fail to breathe.

"Tris," I whisper against her fingers. She lets them drop. "I'm all right."

"Why were you there?" she asks.

"I was coming back from the control room. I heard a scream," I lie. _No I was standing in the hallway where you held my hand, unable to move._

"What did you do to them?"

I sigh. "I deposited Drew at the infirmary a half hour ago. Peter and Al ran. Drew claimed they were just ay."

"He's in bad shape?" Tris asks. _How can you_ possibly _care?_

trying to scare you. At least, I think that's what he was trying to s

"He'll live." My voice goes bitter. "In what condition, I can't say."

"Good," Tris says. Suddenly, she starts to cry.

I crouch by her bed, attempting not to show sympathy.

"I could report this," I say softly.

"No," she replies. "I don't want them to think I'm weak."

Suddenly, and without thought, my hand travels to her cheekbone. My thumb moves absently back and forth, and a small smile coats my face. "I figured you would say that."

"You think it would be a bad idea if I sat up?" she asks me.

"I'll help you," I say, my voice growing stronger.

I grip her shoulder, electricity zapping, and hold her head steady while she pulls herself up.

"You can let yourself be in pain, it's just me here." She bites down on her lip. "I suggest you rely on your transfer friends to protect you from now on," I say, my voice thinning out again.

"I thought I was. But Al…"

As much as I hate Al, I can't help but comfort Tris as she sobs. "He wanted you to be the small, quiet girl from Abnegation," I say softly. "He hurt you because your strength made him feel weak. No other reason. The others won't be as jealous if you show some vulnerability. Even if it isn't real."

"You think I have to _pretend_ to be vulnerable?" she asks, raising her eyebrows. I smile.

"Yes, I do." I stand up, and I see Tris eye the hem of my shirt. I can't help but smile. "You're going to want to march into breakfast tomorrow and show your attackers they had no effect on you, but you should let that bruise on your cheek show, and keep your head down."

Her eyes lift to mine and they look hollow.

"I don't think I can do that."

I let my voice go soft. "You have to."

"I don't think you _get_ it." Her face goes red. "They touched me."

There is nothing soft about me now. Every muscle in my body goes stiff. In one instant, everything goes from bad to _so_ much worse. My hand clenches around the ice pack, causing the beads inside it to burst. _Touched_ her? _TOUCHED_ her? I feel as though I'm about to explode with rage. My body feels like it's heating up and freezing over all at the same time _TOUCHED_ HER! I feel all life leave my body, while at the same time I feel a whole new energy.

"Touched you," I repeat, my voice feeling icy cold.

"Not… in the way you're thinking," I feel the tension physically leave my body. But the tension nearly returns at her next comment, leaving me with a lingering chill. "But almost."

I look away from Tris, out the window. I stand still for so long until her voice interrupts my violent chain of thought.

"What is it?"

"I don't want to say this," I say quietly, "but I feel like I have to. It is more important for you to be safe than right, for the time being. Understand?" Tris nods, and I let out a breath. "But please, when you see an opportunity…" I press my hand to her cheek and I tilt up her head. "Ruin them."

Tris shakily laughs. "You're a little scary, Four." I sigh, feeling more somber.

"Do me a favor, and don't call me that." I just want to hear my real name.

"What should I call you, then?"

"Nothing," I remove my hand from her face, disappointed that she doesn't remember me. "Yet."


	16. Four-lorn ch 16

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 22**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

I step out of the shower and wrap my towel around my waist, poking my head out of my bathroom door. Tris still lies asleep on my bed. I look down at my feet and smile. I scamper lightly across my floor, so as not to wake up the sleeping beauty, and grab clothes from my closet. I slide into them and step out of the closet. Tris is awake, and tying her hair up. I bring a towel to my wet hair, causing my shirt to rise. I see Tris's eyes fall again, and I smile.

"Hi," she says, her voice stiff.

I touch her bruised cheek with my fingertips. "Not bad. How's your head."

"Fine," she says lightly. I know she's lying.

I take in a deep breath, trying not to move my lips too much so she thinks I feel casual, and I drop my hand to her side. The electricity jolting up my arm renders me unsteady for a moment.

"And your side?" I ask. My voice comes out low and strained, like I'm forcing myself to talk.

"Only hurts when I breathe," she forces.

I smile. "Not much you can do about that."

"Peter would probably throw a party if I stopped breathing."

"Well," I say delicately, "I would only go if there was cake."

Tris laughs and then she winces. I then remember that my hand is there. I slide my hand back slowly, drinking in the moment. My fingertips graze her side, and when they finally lift, the removal of the shock of electricity is gone, and I feel a brief moment of peace in my chest. Then the peace is replaced with emptiness and I long to put my hand back. But I don't.

"I'll go in first," I say when we reach the dining hall. "See you soon, Tris."

I walk in. Followed by Tris. I sit across the room from Will and Christina, where I know _she_ will sit. I sit alone.

Tris _does_ sit with Will and Christina. I only catch snipets of their conversation, but when Drew walks in, I'm no longer listening. His face is so bruised and bloodied, I can't help but wear a large satisfied smile. Tris glances at me, but I can't see too much of her face from here. However, I do hear Will.

"Did _you_ do that?" he hisses.

Their conversation continues until it's time for me to get everyone up.

"Transfers. We're doing something different today. Follow me."

Uriah's forehead wrinkles at Tris. "Be careful."

"Don't worry," says Will. "We'll protect her." I smile inwardly.

* * *

I lead the initiates out of the dining hall and along the paths that surround the Pit.

I turn around wand walk backward for a few steps. I know the path well enough and I trust my instincts.

"Pick up the pace, Drew." I share a knowing smile with Tris. Then, the smile leaves my face.

Will goes as white faced as I feel, and he grabs onto Tris's arm for support. Instantly, white hot jealousy courses through my veins. I shake my head. _Will? Seriously? Will likes Christina…_

We begin to get closer and closer to the glass ceiling, and I welcome the sun on my back. I walk up a flight of metal stairs leading to a hole in the ceiling. We walk across the glass, which is now a floor rather than a ceiling, through a cylindrical room with glass walls. The surrounding buildings are collapsed and abandoned. I lead the initiates through another door.

"This is a different kind of simulation known as the fear landscape. It has been disabled for our purposes, so this isn't what it will be like the next time you see it," I say quietly, adjusting to the pale light.

"Through your simulations, we have stored data bout your worst fears. The fear landscape accesses that data and presents you with a series of virtual obstacles. Some of the obstacles will be fears you previously faced in your simulations. Some may be new fears. The difference is that you are aware, in the fear landscape, that it is a simulation, so you will have all your wits about you as you go through it." _So basically, the Divergent can go undetected._

I continue on. "The number of fears you have in your landscape varies according to how many you have. I told you before that the third stage of initiation focuses on mental preparation. That is because it requires you to control both your emotions and your body—to combine the physical abilities you learned in stage one with the emotional mastery you learned in stage two. To keep a level head."

The lights around me flicker. My eyes find Tris's.

"Next week you will go through your fear landscape as quickly as possible in front of a panel of Dauntless leaders. That will be your final test, which determines your ranking for stage three. Just as stage two of initiation is weighted more heavily than stage one, stage three is weighed heaviest of all. Understood?"

I scan the initiate crowd. Then I continue.

"You can get past each obstacle in one of two ways. Either you find a way to calm down enough that the simulation registers a normal, steady heartbeat, or you find a way to face your fear, which can force the simulation to move on. One way to face a fear of drowning is to swim deeper, for example. So I suggest that you take the next week to consider your fears and develop strategies to face them."

"That doesn't sound fair," says Peter. I snicker. "What if one person only has seven fears and someone else has twenty? That's not their fault."

I stare incredulously at Peter for a few seconds, then I laugh. "Do you really want to talk to me about what's fair?" I walk towards Peter slowly. "I understand you're worried, Peter. The events of last night certainly proved that you are a miserable coward."

Peter stares back at me, expressionless.

"So know we all know," I say quietly, "that you are afraid of a short, skinny girl from Abnegation." I smile.

I see Will put his arm around Tris out of the corner of my eye, and I can't help but feel that the camaraderie is ruined.


	17. Four-lorn ch 17

**A/N: THAT WAS SO FUN TO WRITE sorry I had to get that out. Enjoy this piece of Trobias (or Fourtris, I've heard it both ways) fluff!**

**Also, thank you for 50 followers! I hope to continue this into Insurgent if y'alls are still interested, so please tell me what you think!**

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 24**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

Still lying in my bed with my eyes closed, I hear a mysterious voice (that sounds a hell of a lot like Zeke)

"Four! Get your ass up!"

My eyes snap open and my hand lies on my gun.

"What the hell do you want?" I call to the voice outside my door.

"Another initiate jumped!" I sigh. Probably Al. I get up, pulling on my sneakers and jeans and run out the door.

#*#*#

I was right. It was Al. I wander through the crowds of initiates, searching for Tris.

When I find her, I tap her shoulder. "Tris," I say, getting her attention.

"What are you doing here?" she asks. "Shouldn't you be paying your respects?" She spits out the words like they are poison in her mouth.

"Shouldn't you?" I counter.

"Can't pay respect when you don't have any," she replies, but I see guilt flash over her eyes. "I didn't mean that," she quickly verifies.

"Ah," I say, but I don't believe her.

"This is ridiculous," she says, turning pink. "He throws himself off a ledge and Eric's calling it brave? Eric, who tried to have you throw knives at Al's head?" I've never heard Tris so worked up before. "He wasn't brave! He was depressed and a coward and he almost killed me! Is that the kind of thing we respect here?"

I take in a deep breath. "What do you want them to do? Condemn him? Al's already dead. He can't hear about it and it's too late," I say.

"It's not _about_ Al," she snaps at me, causing me to visibly flinch, but she doesn't notice. "It's about everyone watching! Everyone who now sees hurling themselves into the chasm as a viable option. I mean, why not do it if everyone calls you a hero afterward? Why not do it if everyone will remember your name? It's… I can't…"

She shakes her head. Her cheeks have gone to a full red shade and I can hear her heartbeat from here, almost as loud as when I held her hand in the hallway. I feel a wistful sigh leave my lips. Then, she says something that would give me chills.

"This would _never_ have happened in Abnegation!" Her voice escalates to a shout, and I start breathing a little faster. "None of it! Never. This place warped him and ruined him, and I don't care if saying that makes me a Stiff, I don't care, I don't _care_!"

I take in another deep breath, my eyes flicking to the camera behind the drinking fountain, that is surely containing all of Tris's dangerous rants.

"Careful, Tris," I say, not taking my eyes off the wall.

"Is that all you can say?" she exclaims. "That I should be _careful_? That's it?" I roll my eyes and grab her arm, pulling her away from the hidden camera.

"You're as bad as the Candor, you know that?"

She tries to resist my drag, but I'm two years older and stronger than her. I put my hands on her shoulders, squeezing them tight. Any other time, this would be electrocuting my arms, but I can't feel a thing I'm so scared for her. But I don't show it. I stick my face so close to hers that if I leaned down any further our noses would touch.

"I'm not going to say this again, so listen carefully. They are watching you. _You_ in particular," I say quickly and quietly.

"Let go of me," she says weakly.

Softly, I remove my hands from her shoulders, feeling a weight that I was unaware on my shoulders rise.

"Are they watching you, too?" Her voice is so quiet, I wouldn't be able to hear her unless I was standing this close. Hell, I'm so close I could lean down and kiss her right now.

_Then do it,_ the emotional side of my brain complies.

_No,_ logic says.

Logic always wins in the end.

"I keep trying to help you," I say, drawling the words, "but you refuse to be helped."

"Oh right. Your _help_," she says bitterly. "Stabbing my ear with a knife and taunting me and yelling at me more than you yell at anyone else, it sure is helpful."

I sigh softly. "Taunting you? You mean when I threw the knives. I wasn't taunting you," I snap. "I was reminding you that if you failed, someone else would have to take your place."

"Why?" she asks. Why?

"Because you're from Abnegation. And it's when you're acting selflessly that you are at your bravest." I try not to let the pride slide through my voice, but it's hard to stop it. She really is extraordinary. "If I were you, I would do a better job of pretending that the selfless impulse is going away, because if the wrong people discover it… well it won't be good for you."

"Why? Why do they care about my intentions?"

"Intentions are the _only_ thing they care about. They try to make you think they care about what you do, but they don't. They don't want you to act a certain way. They want you to _think_ a certain way. So you're easy to understand. So you're easy to understand. So you won't pose a threat to them."

I press my hand to the wall, and I feel my shirt tighten. I shiver softly, hoping that Tris doesn't see.

"I don't understand why they care what I think, as long as I'm acting how they want me to." I sigh softly again.

"You're acting how they want you to know, but what happens when your Abnegation-wired brain tells you to do something else, something they don't want," I say softly.

"I might not need you to help me. Ever think about that? I'm not weak, you know. I can do this on my own," she says defiantly, and I smile.

"You think my first instinct is to protect you. Because you're small, or a girl, or a Stiff. But you're wrong."

Finally, I let emotion win out. I lean in close to her face, so that my nose is nearly. I wrap my fingers around her chin, vaguely aware of the smell of gunpowder on my hands. I can feel electricity streaming through my veins.

"My _first_ instinct is to push you until you break, just to see how hard I have to press," I say, squeezing her chin softly. My breath falls short. "But I resist it."

"Why…" she takes a deep breath and swallows hard. "Why is that your first instinct?"

Now I let the pride in my voice fly. "Fear doesn't shut you down; it wakes you up. I've seen it. It's fascinating." My hand loosens around her neck, grazing the three crows tattooed on her collarbone. "Sometimes I just…" my voice sounds wistful, "want to see it again." Then my voice goes quiet. "Want to see you awake."

I watch Tris's mind struggle with a decision, and then she does it. She sets her hands on my waist, stringing her thumbs loosely through the belt loops of my jeans, the tips of her fingers touching the muscles in my lower back. Every hair on my body stands up straight. I can't breathe. I touch my hand to the small of her back, pulling her against me. I run my other hand over the back of her hair, smoothing it down.

_I could kiss her. I could kiss her right now._ I have to remember to breathe. _In and out. In and out._ Wow. She's so beautiful. _In and out._ I don't want to be taking advantage of her, but she's just so spectacular. _In and out._

I start to lean down, but then I stop. She buries her head into my shoulder, and she starts to sob. I rest my chin softly on her forehead.

"Should I be crying? Is there something wrong with me?" Her voice is muffled by my shirt.

I shake my head. "You think I know anything about tears?" I say softly.

"If I had forgiven him, do you think he would be alive now?" She lifts her face, pressing only her forehead to my shirt. She looks down at our feet, nearly intertwined. Nearly.

"I don't know," I reply. I press the palm of my hand to her cheek, gripping softly at her smooth skin and lifting up her face. She nuzzles her cheek ever so slightly, keeping her eyes closed.

"I feel like it's my fault," she says quietly.

"It isn't your fault," I say, bending my neck downward, to allow my forehead to press with hers. Every inch of my body is electric.

"But I should have. I should have forgiven him."

"Maybe," I say. "Maybe there's more well all could have done, but we just have to let the guilt remind us to do better next time."

Tris pulls back, and I curse myself inwardly. I learned that in Abnegation, and she recognizes it.

"What faction did you come from, Four?" I take a deep breath at her words.

"It doesn't matter," I respond a little too fast. "This is where I am now. Something you would do well to remember for yourself."

I look at her, my mind feeling conflicted. _One, two, three, _I count in my mind. Right when I hit three, I touch my lips to her forehead, before I can stop myself. Her hands are still on my waist, slightly under my black shirt. There is only one way to describe how I feel.

I feel on fire.


	18. Four-lorn ch 18

**A/N: I bet you guys can guess what's coming next chapter! This should tide you over for now, but next chapter is (DUN DUN DUN) the kiss! Well I'm going to get writing, I have waited so long and so patiently. Well enjoy this for now!**

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 25**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

As I walk through the Pit, I feel something white hit my shoulder. _Is it snowing?_ No, it isn't snowing. It's a shredded piece of paper. On it is a picture of Jeanine Matthews. I shiver and toss it into the river. I know Tris threw it. I keep walking. After a few minutes, I hear soft footsteps, like they belong to a small, skinny girl from Abnegation. I smile to myself and keep walking. There is something I need to do, and it's okay if she's there.

I walk into the fear landscape room. "Since you're here," I say over my shoulder, "you might as well go in with me." I take a deep breath. _Am I really ready to let someone in?_ My mind answers that question for me. _Yes._

"Into your fear landscape?" She sounds scared. I turn to face her, but I can't bring myself to meet her eyes.

"Yes," I say quietly.

"I can do that?" she asks, walking towards me.

I find it calming to spout facts. "The serum connects you to the program, but the program decides whose landscape you go through. And right now," I say hesitantly, "it's set to put us through mine."

"You would let me see that?" she says nervously. I smile, staring at the floor.

"Why else do you think I'm going in?" I ask quietly. "There are some things I want to show you." _about who I am,_ I add silently.

I hold up the syringe, and Tris tilts her head expectantly. I inject her neck.

"I've never done this before," she says nervously, as if she doesn't want to hurt me.

"Right here," I whisper, tapping my neck with my fingernail. She does it and I don't flinch. I look at her the whole time. I take her hand in mine, and the electricity feels almost familiar. Almost.

"See if you can figure out why they call me Four," I whisper. She inches closer to me, and I feel the electricity in the air.

"What's your real name?" she asks. I smile.

"See if you can figure that out too."

Then the simulation takes us. We stand on the roof, and the wind starts blowing. I feel her lean against me for support, and I wrap my hand around her shoulder. I have to begin to force breaths in and out of my lips, not just because the electricity from her body is trying to stop my lungs from working. The heights.

"We have to jump off, right?" she shouts. I nod stiffly. She looks sympathetically at me. _How does this not scare you?_ "On three, okay?" I nod tersely again. "One…two..._three!_" She pulls me with her into a run, and then we fall. It's anything I can do not to cry. Then the scene disappears.

I see her smile, as we sit in the room that's only feeling smaller for me now that she's here.

"What's next?" she asks.

"It's-" I begin to tell her, but she's cut off when the walls hit her. She slams into me, and my body jolts.

"Confinement," she finishes for me.

I make a guttural noise. I grimace.

"Hey," she whispers. "Hey it's okay. Here—"

She pulls my arms around her body, so that I can move. It honestly only takes my breath away. I refuse to move my arms any closer, so I can hold onto my breath.

"This is the first time I'm happy I'm so small," she says with a laugh. Trying to distract me.

"Mmhmm," I say, my voice feeling strained.

"We can't break out of here," she says nervously. "It's easier to face the fear head on, right?" _Yeah, my heartbeat's never coming back down to normal. Not with you AND the walls._ She doesn't wait for me to respond. "So what you need is to make the space smaller. Make it worse so it gets better. Right?"

"Yes," I say tersely.

"Okay. We'll have to crouch, then. Ready?" She squeezes my waist, which arouses me (in more ways than one) and tries to pull me down, as the ceiling inches down. I feel my breath against her ear.

"Ah," I say, my voice raspy. "This is worse. This is definitely…"

"Shh," she orders. "Arms around me." I obediently slip my arms around her. She tries not to smile at the wall. I would smile too, if I wasn't so damn scared. _God, what was I_ thinking _bringing her in here?_ _Now she's just going to think I'm weak._ _Well, it's too late now._ "The simulation measures your fear response, so if you can calm your heartbeat down, it will move on to the next one. Remember? So try to forget that we're here."

"Yeah?" I whisper, my lips moving against her neck. "That easy, huh?"

She smiles, rolling her eyes. "You know, most boys would enjoy being trapped in close quarters with a girl."

"Not claustrophobic people, Tris!" My voice comes out much more shrill than I had intended.

"Okay, okay." She pulls my hand to her heart, and jolts of electricity run through my veins, but I'm too scared to notice. "Feel my heartbeat. Can you feel it?"

"Yes."

"Feel how steady it is?"

"It's fast," I say quickly.

"Yes, well, that has nothing to do with the box." I see her wince, and I let out a small, low chuckle. "Every time you feel me breathe, you breathe. Focus on that."

"Okay," I whisper. I let my breath synchronize with hers.

"Why don't you tell me where this fear comes from. Maybe talking about it will help us… somehow."

"Um… okay. This one is from my fantastic childhood. Childhood punishments. The tiny closet upstairs."

"My mother kept our winter coats in our closet."

I don't understand how she doesn't realize that we are talking about the same closet. How she doesn't realize that the closet upstairs is only in Abnegation designed houses.

"I don't…" I gasp. "I don't really want to talk about it anymore."

"Okay. Then… I can talk. Ask me something."

"Okay," I laugh shakily. "Why is your heart racing, Tris?" Like I need an answer.

I feel her cringe, and I smile softly. "Well," she starts. "I barely know you." She shakes herself softly. "I barely know you and I'm crammed up against you in a box, Four, what do you think?"

"If we were in your fear landscape, would I be in it?" I pretend to be joking, but really my nerves only rise.

"I'm not afraid of you," she says evasively.

"Of course you're not. But that's not what I meant." My voice cracks. Then the walls vanish. I sigh and stand, lifting my arms from Tris's body. I see her shiver.

"Maybe you were cut out for Candor," I say quietly to Tris, "because you're a terrible liar."

"I think my aptitude test ruled that one out pretty well."

I shake my head. "The aptitude tests tell you nothing."

She narrows her eyes. "What are you trying to tell me? Your test isn't the reason you ended up in Dauntless."

Damn it. I knew this would bite me in the ass. "Not exactly no. I…" I look at the woman. I wonder what she looks like to Tris. Sure, it's a random woman, but does Tris see the similarity. She hasn't exactly spent her whole life looking in the mirror… Either way.

"You have to kill her," she says softly.

"Every single time," I whisper.

"She isn't real," Tris says reassuringly.

So she doesn't see the resemblance. I only noticed it now. "She looks real," I bite my lip. "It feels real," I whisper.

"If she was real, she would have killed you already."

"It's okay," I nod. "I'll just do it. This one's not… not so bad. Not as much panic involved." I exhale, then fire the gun. Then she crumples to the floor.

"Here we go," I whisper as she grabs my arm, pulling me away. I follow her. Then I stop cold. I see a figure in the distance, but I know who it is already. I just hope Tris doesn't figure it out. _Don't be ridiculous. We're here to tell her._ I roll my eyes, in spite of the fear. I start to breathe, hard. She looks curiously at me. Then Marcus emerges from the dark.

"Marcus," she whispers.

"Here's the part," I say, my voice shaking with fear, "where you figure out my name."

"Is he…" she points at Marcus. Then she stops. "Tobias."

Then he shows us his hands and I see the belt. I let out a choked sob, almost unaware of Tris in the background.

"This is for your own good," he says. And then they all come. I freeze still. All I can do is stop the tears from falling. I shrink back, accustomed to old habit, to hide from my father's whip. Just when he swings, Tris darts in front of me.

My worst nightmare has escalated. My father is beating the girl I love. Did I just admit that? It doesn't matter. I see her jolt in pain, but I still can't move. I still can't help her.

Then I jolt out of it. I stand, all fear replaced with pure anger. My vision goes red and I miss whatever happens next. I stand and shove Tris behind me, protecting her from Marcus. All fear is gone. Then they vanish. I'm free.

"That's it?" she asks. "Those were your worst fears? Why do you have only four… Oh. That's why they call you—"

Then she sees my face. If I look as vulnerable as I feel, then that explains her reaction. I wrap my hand around her elbow and pull her towards me. My lips move against her cheek, but then I pull her into a hug, burying my face into her neck, trying to stifle the tears. The electricity is pounding, but I don't notice it. I'm too scared.

She stiffens, then relaxes, looping her arms around my waist.

"Hey," she whispers softly. "We got through it." I lift my head, strangling my fingers through her hair.

"You got me through it," I whisper.

"Well. It's easy to be brave when they're not my fears."

I lace my fingers with hers. Suddenly, mind cleared, I have an idea.

"Come on," I say. "I have something to show you."


	19. Four-lorn ch 19

**A/N: Well, everyone, here it is! ****_The_**** chapter! Enjoy, and please tell me what you think! More coming soon!**

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 26**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy (I would be re-writing the end of Allegiant with fluffy unicorns and rainbows right now if I did) or any of the characters**

* * *

I take Tris's hand in my own and I lead her towards my special spot. I can feel a nervous tremor in her hand, and to comfort her, I run a fingertip down her palm. The hairs on my arm stand up straight.

"So…" she says, trying to make conversation. "Four fears."

"Four fears then; four fears now," I say, nodding. "They haven't changed, so I keep going in there, but…I still haven't made any progress."

"You can't be fearless, remember?" she says. "Because you still care about things. About your life."

"I know," I whisper. _I still care about you._

We walk along the Pit on the narrow path that leads to my special place. I know this path well, it's the path I use to hide from Marcus on Visiting Day.

"You were going to tell me about your aptitude test results," she says, bursting me out of the comforting thought bubble.

Using my free hand, I scratch my neck uncomfortable. "Ah. Does it matter?"

"Yes," she demands. "I want to know."

"How demeaning you are," I say with a smile.

Then we reach the end of the path. I guide her down over the slippery rocks to my flat rock. Then I release her hand hesitantly.

"These are things I don't tell people, you know. Not even my friends," I say nervously. But she isn't exactly a friend anymore. I don't know quite what she is.

"My result was as expected," I say hesitantly. "Abnegation."

"Oh," she says, sounding disappointed. _She thinks I'm Divergent._

"But you chose Dauntless anyway?" she presses.

"Out of necessity," I say quickly.

"Why did you have to leave?" she asks.

I look away from her, looking at the waterfall. I see her hand go subconsciously to her other wrist, where Marcus's belt hit hers. I feel a twinge of pain in my heart that I let him hurt her. I will never let that go.

"You had to get away from your dad," she whispers. "Is that why you don't want to be a Dauntless leader? Because if you were, you might have to see him again?"

I lift my shoulder. "That, and I've always felt that I don't quite belong among the Dauntless. Not the way they are now, anyway."

"But you're… incredible," she says with a pause. She clears her throat. "I mean, by Dauntless standards. Four fears is unheard of. How could you not belong here?"

I shrug. "I have a theory that selflessness and braver aren't all that different. All your life you've been training to forget yourself, so that when you're in danger, it becomes your first instinct. I could belong in Abnegation just as easily."

"Yeah, well, I left Abnegation because I wasn't selfless enough, no matter how hard I tried to be," she says pitilessly.

"That's not entirely true," I say with a smile. "That girl who let someone throw knives at her to spare a friend, who hit my dad with a belt to protect me—that selfless girl, that's not you?"

"You've been paying close attention, haven't you?" she asks me suspiciously.

I take a deep breath. "I like to observe people."

"Maybe you were cut out for Candor, Four," I wince when she uses my nickname, "because you're a terrible liar."

I set my hand on the rock, lining it up with hers. "Fine," I say, leaning closer to her face, my eyes locking onto her lips. "I watched you because I like you." _Did I just say that?_ "And don't call me 'Four,' okay? It's nice to hear my name again."

Her cheeks go red. "But you're older than I am… _Tobias_."

I smile. "Yes, that whopping two-year gap really is _insurmountable_, isn't it?"

"I'm not trying to be self-depreciating," she says quietly. "I just don't get it. I'm younger. I'm not pretty. I—"

I laugh, and I softly press my lips into her temple.

"Don't pretend. You know I'm not. I'm not ugly, but I certainly am not pretty."

I softly remove my lips from her temple. "Fine. You're not pretty. So?" I kiss her cheek softly. "I like how you look. You're deadly smart. You're brave. And even though you found out about Marcus…" my voice goes weak. "You aren't giving me that look. Like I'm a kicked puppy or something."

"Well," she says softly. "You're not."

And now here it is. The perfect moment. I'm glad I didn't kiss her on the night Al died. Right here, right now, is so much better. I touch her face and lean in real close, and I brush my lips against hers. I feel the blood in my cheeks spread all through my body like an instantaneous, burning wave. I grin and press my mouth to hers.

I take her face in my hands, and she wraps her arms around me. The fire, the fire that I had believed to be quenched by the rains of complications, still burns bright, despite the storm. Not just my lips, but my whole body burns bright like a star in the night sky. Surely, back in the Dauntless compound, they can see the flames burning bright in the Pit, but I don't care. This is _my_ fire. And, not thinking about yesterday or tomorrow, just right now, I make a decision.

I'm going to let the fire burn.

**TBC**


	20. Four-lorn ch 20

**A/N: 20 Chapters! Thank you everyone who helped get me here! I'm sorry this chapter is so incompetent, I just finished my first final exam and I'm really tired, but I knew I had to publish something. I think the next chapter ****_should_**** be better, but either way. Enjoy this for now!**

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 27**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

When I wake up the next morning, I feel better than I have since the day I left Abnegation. Hell, I feel better than I did since my seventh birthday. That's when my dad gave me his "gift."…

I leap out of bed, enthusiastic to start the day. I can hear the calls of the other trainers outside my door, and I run out with them.

"What's with you today, Four?" Zeke asks me.

"Can't a guy have a nice day?" I respond, smiling brighter.

Zeke rolls his eyes. "Whatever," he says, pushing open the door to the cafeteria. I run my hands through my hair, which I just cut Abnegation short.

Abnegation… Would Tris and I have ended up here, but in grey? Life would have been safer for us, I mean she would be a shoe-in for Abnegation, but Dauntless? Will she make it through initiation? _Who am I kidding, she's in first,_ I think to myself with a smile.

Then I stop dead. _She's in first…_ And if Eric finds out we're dating, he'll question her ranking. I feel my heart fall through my chest. _We can't be together…_

Head down, I walk into the cafeteria. I see out of the corner of my eye, Tris smiles and waves at me. I hide my face, so as not to show the pain, and I sit down with Zeke, not even looking over.

I see Tris's face fall. _I'm so sorry…_

She won't even look at me.

* * *

Everyone stands outside the fear landscape room, dawdling quietly as Lauren talks. I keep my eyes trained on the floor, trying to ignore everyone.

"Most of you will have anywhere from ten to fifteen fears in your fear landscape. That is the average number," she says.

"What's the lowest number someone has gotten?" Lynn asks. _Did you have to ask?_

"In recent years, four." I feel my face burn, but I don't move. I can feel Tris's eyes flick towards me.

"You will not find out your number today," says Lauren. "The simulation is set to my fear landscape program, so you will experience my fears instead of your own."

Then I begin to tune everyone out.

I can't believe myself. I've already hurt her again, when I vowed just last night that I would never let harm go near her.

Before I know it, Lauren is inserting the needle in her neck.

Then she goes in.

She stands next to the chasm, and faceless men begin to grab her, as she thrashes and kicks and screams. She screams and screams until she can't scream anymore and tears burn down her cheeks.

"Stop," I say loudly to Lauren. I'm ready to scream it at the top of my lungs. I can't take her pain anymore. Lauren looks curiously at me, and I realise I need a cover. I stomp over to the chair and wrench Tris to her feet.

_Sorry. I'm sorry._

But I don't say that.

"What the hell was that, Stiff?" I ask violently.

"I…" her voice hiccups. "I didn't—"

"Get yourself together! This is pathetic," I say emotionlessly.

Her cheeks go pink.

"Shut up," she says, yanking her arm from mine and stomping out of the room in defeat.

I stand still. I can't move.

"Are you just going to let her talk to you like that?" I hear Lauren ask in the background, her voice sounding incredulous behind the ringing in my ears. My face goes cold. My whole body goes cold.

I nod softly.

Lauren scoffs. "When did you become so soft?" she asks, shaking her head as she walks by me.

I still don't move. I still can't move. It hurts too bad to move.


	21. Four-lorn ch 21

**A/N: Hello! Next chapter, here! I'm just curious, how am I doing with all the mushy, romantic stuff? I (unfortunately) don't really have any first-hand experience with romance, so I'm just going off of what I've read and seen. Is it okay? Any suggestions?**

**Second, I'm thinking of starting another fanfiction like this one, that goes chapter by chapter in another person's POV. Which should I do?**

**The Infernal Devices**

**-Gabriel Lightwood (or Gideon Lightwood, I really don't care which)**

**-Will Herondale**

**-James Carstairs**

**The Mortal Instruments**

**-Isabelle Lightwood**

**-Jace Herondale**

**The Hunger Games**

**-Gale Hawthorne**

**-Rue**

**Any other ideas? (Please, feel free to look on my profile under "Fandoms" and pick one and a person from that book, it has to be a book not a movie, and tell me what to do, and I'll consider it!)**

**Please review!**

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 28**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

The hallways of the Dauntless headquarters have never seemed so melancholy before. After lying on my bed for hours, everything feels melancholy to me.

_You lied to her. You betrayed her. You are a sick fool._

The voices in my head scream at me, reprimanding my every flinch. What else could I have done?

One voice, in the back of my mind, one of the quietest voices in my head, finally speaks up.

_You could have been with her and damned the consequences._

That was when I realised I couldn't be left alone with myself anymore.

Wandering around the hallways was what I used to do. It's how I handled being here. When I would hear my father's voice echoing in my brain and I realised I couldn't handle myself I would walk the hallways to clear my head. Normally, I would find myself in the training room, where I would practise and stab and shoot anything and everything in the room.

That's why I was on the path to the Dauntless training room, and that's when I heard the voices.

"If you cannot explain," I hear Eric say in his soft, chilling voice, "I may be forced to reconsider your rank. Or because you seem to be so attached to your previous faction… perhaps I will be forced to reconsider your friends' ranks. Perhaps the little Abnegation girl inside of you would take that more seriously."

It is with a chill that I realise he is talking to Tris. I hear her stutter through the walls, and then I decide I've had enough with his threats.

"What are you doing?" I ask Eric, my voice rash.

"Leave the room," he says, his voice a low monotone, like listening to someone read from a book.

"No," I say. "She's just a foolish girl. There's no need to drag her here and interrogate her."

"Just a foolish girl," Eric snorts. "If she were just a foolish girl, she wouldn't be ranked first, now would she?"

I don't dignify him with a response. I simply pinch the bridge of my nose. I lean my head back, looking at Tris. Hopefully she understands what I mean. _Be vulnerable,_ I will her silently.

I watch her hand travel to her leg, as she pinches herself so hard that tears begin to well in her eyes.

"I… I was just embarrassed and didn't know what to do." She begins to cry harder. "I tried to… and…" her voice is racked with sobs as she looks into Eric's eyes pitifully.

"You tried to what?" I haven't seen Eric return pity in a long time. I sometimes wonder what the hell ever happened to him, for him to be so screwed up like this.

Suddenly, and without thinking, a thought comes out of my mouth.

"Kiss me," I intercede quickly. _What the hell am I thinking?_ "And I rejected her," I continue cautiously, keeping my eyes locked on Tris. "And she went running off like a five-year-old. There's really nothing to blame her for but stupidity."

I take in a deep, silent breath. We both wait.

Eric looks at her, then at me. Then he laughs a long, slow laugh that still gives me chills. "Isn't he a little too old for you, Tris?" he says, smiling.

"Can I go now?" she says, sobbing.

"Fine," Eric says, his voice filled with mirth, "but you are not allowed to leave to compound without supervision again, you hear me?" Then Eric turns towards me. "And _you_… had better make sure none of the other transfers leave this compound again." Then his voice goes to an awkward tone. "And that none of the others try to kiss you."

_Is that_ jealousy _in his tone?_ It's pretty clear that he doesn't like _Tris_ like that… I let the thought go cold with a chill.

"Fine," I say, rolling my eyes. I let her leave first, and then after a minute of silence, I throw Eric a glare and walk out of the room.

I find Tris sitting five feet away from the door on the pavement, and I go stand behind her.

"What?" she asks harshly, like she's expecting punishment.

I can't punish her, even though I really should.

"Are you alright?" I ask softly.

"Well, first I got reamed out in front of everyone, and then I had to chat with the woman who's trying to destroy my old faction, and then Eric almost tossed my friends out of Dauntless, so yeah, it's shaping up to be a pretty great day, _Four_," she says bitterly, her voice enunciating my nickname.

I flinch at the number, shaking my head and looking across the pavement.

"Why do you care, anyway?" she says, bitterness like bile in her throat. "You can be either cruel instructor or concerned boyfriend." I freeze. "You can't play both parts at the same time."

I scowl at her. "I am not cruel. I was protecting you this morning. How do you think Peter and his idiot friends would have reacted if they discovered that you and I were…" my voice trails off with a sigh. "You would never win. They would always call your ranking a result of my favoritism rather than your skill."

She opens her mouth to contradict me, but then falls short. Her cheeks go red, and she presses her hands to them.

"You didn't have to insult me to prove something to them," she says quietly.

_I know._

"And you didn't have to run off to your brother just because I hurt you," I say, scratching the back of my neck anxiously. "Besides—it worked, didn't it?"

"At my expense," she says quietly. I feel a twinge of guilt.

"I didn't think it would affect you this way," I say, looking at my feet. "Sometimes I forget that I can hurt you. That you are capable of being hurt."

But I did hurt her. And I can never forgive myself for that.

She slides her hands in her pockets, and the look on her face fills me with a feeling that I am not used to. It's sweet, like sugar, and yet it makes me feel like cotton inside, rather than rock.

She turns to me, and she stands on her tiptoes, touching her lips to mine. I have to remember to breathe. Her lips feel like acid on mine, and it hurts and I feel good.

"You're brilliant, you know that?" she whispers to me. "You always know exactly what to do."

I sigh softly against her skin. "Only because I've been thinking about this for a long time," I say, pressing my lips to hers, ignoring the burst that still comes. "How I would handle it if you and I…" Then I realise something she said. "Did I hear you call me your boyfriend, Tris?"

I slip my hand to her neck, running my thumbs under her chin, tilting my face down so that our foreheads touch.

"Not exactly." She shrugs. "Why? Do you want me to?"

I stand there quietly for a moment, drinking it in. My eyes remain closed. I can feel her pulse through my fingers.

"Yes," I say finally. A smile, that has been long on my lips, fades slowly. "You think we convinced him you're just a silly girl?"

"I hope so," she says quietly. "Sometimes it helps to be small. I'm not sure I convinced the Erudite, though."

Then I realise I have to tell her. I have to tell her everything. "There's something I need to tell you," I whisper.

"What is it?" she says curiously.

"Not now," I look around my shoulder, expecting a fuming Eric to launch out of the building. "Meet me back here at eleven thirty. Don't tell anyone where you're going."

She nods, and I turn, leaving as fast as I came.

* * *

Late that night, I see Tris running towards me. I smile to myself, and I grab her wrist, and pull her on the train.

She jumps in and falls against me, her cheek on my chest. I feel electricity radiating all around me. My fingers loosely slide down her arms, holding her elbows.

"What do you need to tell me?" she asks.

"Not yet," I whisper.

I sit down on the floor, and I pull her down with me, so that I sit with my back to the wall, ands he sits facing me. I brush her hair away from her face softly.

I press my lips to hers softly, then I kiss the skin below her jaw. I hear her sigh softly, although she thinks I can't hear it over the wind.

The train wobbles her, and she puts her hand on something to straighten herself. That something is my hip, and it surprises me.

She shifts, swinging her leg over me so that she's on my lap, and I sit up straight in surprise. She presses her lips softly to mine. My hands find their way along her spine, and then I unzip her jacket a little.

Then I see the birds on her collarbone. My lips pull away from hers with a small smile.

"Birds," I whisper. "Are they crows? I keep forgetting to ask," I say sheepishly.

She smiles back. "Ravens. One for each member of my family. You like them?" she asks.

I don't answer. Instead, I softly press my lips to each bird in turn. I lightly rest my hand on her cheek.

"I hate to say this," I say, "but we have to get up now." I pull her up with me and we look over the edge.

I point to the Erudite headquarters.

"Apparently the city ordinances don't mean anything to them, because their lights will be on all night," I say.

"No one else has noticed?" Tris points out.

"I'm sure they have, but they haven't done anything to stop it. It may be because they don't want to cause a problem over something so small. But it made me wonder what the Erudite are doing that requires night light."

I keep going.

"Two things you should know about me. The first is that I am deeply suspicious of people in general. It is my nature to expect the worst of them. And the second is that I am unexpectedly good with computers."

She nods.

I sigh.

"A few weeks ago, before training started, I was at work and I found a way into the Dauntless secure files. Apparently we are not as skilled as the Erudite are at security, and what I discovered was what looked like war plans. Thinly veiled commands, supply lists, maps. Things like that. And those files were send by Erudite."

"War?" she says wearily.

Then she looks up at me.

"War on Abnegation?" she says. She looks like she already knows the answer.

I take her hand in mine.

"The faction that controls the government. Yes," I say quietly. "All those reports are supposed to stir up dissension against Abnegation. Evidently the Erudite now want to speed up the process. I have no idea what to do about it… or what could even be done.

"But, why would Erudite team up with Dauntless?" she asks.

I stare intently in her eyes. Then her eyes widen.

"They're going to use us," she whispers.

"I wonder how they plan to get us to fight," I say quietly.

I can see her mind working on the possibilities. Hair blows in her face, and I hold tighter to her hands. Her next answer scares me the most.

"I don't know."


	22. Four-lorn ch 22

**A/N: Hello! Sorry I haven't updated, it's been a crazy weekend. Here's the next chapter! **

**Chapter(s) of Divergent (the actual book): 29+30 (since 29 was so short for Tobias, I just combined them both, hope that's okay :P)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

The day after the ride on the train was the slowest, longest, hardest day that I have had for a long time. My mind wanders to the Prior house in Abnegation. How I wish that I could go to them, and tell them. Tell them that their daughter is ranked first. That she's extraordinary. And I wish I could warn them. Tell them to lock their doors, shut their windows, and slip out the back door unnoticed.

But I can't.

I don't know when the Dauntless will strike. I don't know how, or where, or even why. I only know who.

The breakfast hall feels utterly somber and empty. The initiates sit in the corner, stone faced and ghost eyed. I watch Tris Prior's robotic movements as she eats.

"Time to go," I hear Christina's ghost of a whisper across the room. She's right. It's time to go.

The initiates walk back to the dormitory, but I walk to the simulation room. The Dauntless leaders line up and sit down in a row of chairs, hooking wires into their heads. The Dauntless-born go first.

Sometimes it's easy to tell what the initiate is afraid of. If they're eyes widen and they feel with their hands around them, it's clear that they are in darkness. However, I find some fears are harder to distinguish. I wish that they would hook me up to the simulation as well, but they don't.

After the first Dauntless-born finishes (I never really bothered to learn their names), Eric stops her. He injects her arm with a colored liquid. My lips part with a frown. My attention is brought back with stomping feet.

After a while, I see the transfer initiates walk up. The blanket-like cover of melancholy sits over them like a cloud of mist. Tris walks past me, not making eye contact. I can't help but train my gaze on her.

_Extraordinary…_

"Hey, Tris!" I hear Uriah call. "You can sit on my lap, if you want." I feel my face flush red.

"Tempting," she calls. I feel my muscles twitch. "It's fine. I like to stand," she says, mirth on her voice. I feel my shoulders slouch. That's my girl.

"Transfers, the order in which you go through the final test was taken from your rankings as they now stand," I say. "So Drew will go first, and Tris will go last."

Tris lets out a breath. I dare my eyes to glance at hers, and I feel reassured when her gaze meets mine. Eric sticks Drew with a needle, a fake smile plastered on his face. _Who dropped him when he was a baby?_

I see Tris's eyes close, and she takes in a deep breath. Drew takes a good hour before he is out. After him is Molly. She only takes half his time, but still she struggles. I see her continuously stop and take in a deep breath. Her screams fill my ears.

Then Christina. I can't help but smile to myself. She's spunky, but I like her. Don't tell Will I said that. He'll mistake my fondness for non-platonic affection, and I'd really rather not wake up headless. I see her hands swatting around her, flicking bugs off of herself throughout. _I wonder what she's afraid of…_

Twelve minutes.

Then Will is up.

Ten minutes.

Then Peter. I resist a scowl. _I hope Will beats him…_ I know favoritism is bad and all that, but I really do hope that Will ranks higher than him. I would be utterly disappointed if Peter was an ambassador to the factions, or worse, a Dauntless leader. What a trio they would make, Eric, Max, and Peter. They all have the same brutality to them.

Fifteen minutes.

Then _she's_ up.

"Tris," I call softly. She stands up, straightening her shirt. "Ready?" I ask. She nods softly and goes in. She takes a deep breath as Eric injects her, the artificially placid smile still adorning his metal features.

I see her shake her shoulder, as though she was trying to get something off of it. _The crows…_ I suddenly know what fear she's in. It's the ones from the previous simulations. Suddenly, I see her hand curve around something, her index finger pressing down on an invisible trigger. Is this a new fear? Where did she get the gun?

Then her hands fall to her sides. The gun is gone. She pounds against an invisible wall with her hands, tilting her head back and gasping. _The water tank…_ She pounds harder and harder, tilting her head back further, her heart rate rising on the monitor in front of me. Then she stops. She takes a deep breath. And then she keeps pounding and kicking and screaming. Then she stops again, the corners of her lips rising. She sticks out her index finger, and taps the air.

Her hands fall to her sides faster than she was moving before. _She's out of the water…_ But then she isn't. She falls back, as though something hit her, but yet she doesn't hit the ground. More _water?_

She screams at the top of her lungs. Then she bends down and grabs something. Then she stops for a moment, and looks around her at whatever surrounds her. Now she is utterly still. I wonder what this fear is… I don't recognize it from the simulations. Her head shakes, and it looks like she is trying to wriggle out of something. I don't know what it is. Then she closes her eyes and breathes.

Her mouth forms a word. _No,_ she says. _Know what I smell?_ No. I must have read her lips wrong. _I smell rain,_ I read from her lips. What the hell? I have absolutely no idea what she is experiencing.

Then she stops, her body loosening and her arms falling. She straightens her jacket. Then she looks up, her eyes widening. I can't tell what she's doing. She presses her palm to something, I can't tell what. She looks like a mime. Her fingers wrap around something, like they did at the beginning. _Another gun…_ I struggle to find out what she's going through. Then she sits, screaming. She takes deep breaths.

Then she stands, the look in her eyes utterly familiar, like she's looking right at me. Then she rushes forward, her lips parting. _Is she_ kissing _someone?_ Her head lifts, like someone who has about a foot of height on her is pulling her head upwards. Wait… _I'm_ about a foot taller than her. Am _I_ in her fear landscape? I watch the zipper of her jacket slide down with dexterity only my fingers are capable of. I hear a laughter, and I realise the Dauntless leaders are laughing at her fear. I see Eric turn his head and look at me, mirth filling his dead gaze. He raises one metallic eyebrow, running his studded tongue over his teeth. I feel the blood run to my cheeks, burning through my skin. _So it is me in the simulation…_ The cackles of the Dauntless leaders fill my ears, giving me the chills.

"Immodest," I hear Max whisper to Eric. I think I'm going to be sick.

"Revolting," I hear Eric whisper back.

Another leader, who I don't know, whispers, "The Stiff's got game."

Why are they sticking their filthy noses in my love life? But, more importantly, why is Tris afraid of kissing me? Have I upset her? Have I done something wrong? Oh God… _what if she doesn't love me?_

I let the thought run dry. I see her push the air back, most likely pushing me away. Her head is in her hands, her cheeks red. I see her react to something on her neck. _Oh GOD. Am I kissing her_ neck? _And the Dauntless leaders are_ watching? I hear whistles and whoops of cheer from the observation room. I didn't think I could possibly feel more embarrassed.

I watch her lips form words. _I am not going to sleep with you in a hallucination. Okay?_ I feel bile coming up in my throat. This is humiliating for _me._ I can only imagine how _she_ must feel. Then laughter emerges from her lips. _What?_ She purses her lips, pressing them forward into thin air, wrapping her arms around an invisible figure. She's giving _in?_

Then her arms fall, warmth leaves her face as her spine goes rigid. _Oh,_ I think to myself. _This_ fear. She has to kill her family. She looks afraid. She begins to raise her arm up, like to shoot them, but then her hand falls. _Tris, what are you doing? Tris!_ Her fingers uncurl and the invisible gun slides from her hands. I see her head rock forwards, like she's been shot in the base of her skull. And then the screens go black.


	23. Four-lorn ch 23

**A/N: Hi everyone! Firstly, Happy Holidays/Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa/etc.! Like I (think I) promised, here is a Christmas day chapter! Second, I think I have the general outline of this fiction planned out. I will: **

**1. Finish Divergent through Four/Tobias's POV**

**2. Write Insurgent (in the same story) through Four/Tobias's POV (that will be called 'Four-given', but it will still be under the title 'Four-lorn')**

**3. I will unfortunately be skipping Allegiant (mostly because the chapters in which Tobias is featured is already in his POV, even though I think he sounds too Tris-y, but that's not the point), but I will write an epilogue (also in Four/Tobias's POV, but when he's in his late 40s), which will be called 'Four-ever', but will still be published under the same title, 'Four-lorn'.**

**Please tell me what you think, if you have any suggestions or ideas, your sweet words motivate me to get new chapters rolling faster, so ****_PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE_**** review! It means so much to me!**

**Third, to the Guest who reviewed my story: The fear with the water, that was the one where she was drowning in the ocean, but it was really about her being in control. Hope that helped!**

**Anyway, that's enough of your time taken up by my rambling, I hope you all enjoy this chapter, and have an absolutely wonderful holiday!**

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 31**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

When the lights come on I burst into the room. Max and Eric walk in front of me.

"Congratulations, Tris," Eric's metallic voice says. I think of his pierced eyebrow rising when he sees her. I shiver to myself, offering a smile to Tris. "You have successfully completed your final evaluation."

She raises her hand to the back of her skull. I frown curiously at her, but she doesn't see.

"Thanks," she whispers.

"There is one more thing before you can go and get ready for the welcoming banquet," he says, beckoning to one of the leaders, who I don't recognize. "At least you aren't afraid of needles," he says, activating a dry laugh from the other leaders. "This will inject you with a tracking device that will be activated only if you are reported missing. Just a precaution."

"How often do people go missing?" she asks with a frown.

"Not often," Eric says with a smirk. "This is a new development, courtesy of the Erudite. We have been injecting every Dauntless throughout the day, and I assume all other factions will comply as soon as possible."

I frown to myself. _Developed by Erudite?_

"All right," she says tersely.

Eric roughly injects her with the needle. Any misconceptions I had earlier about Eric's intentions are now cleared, and I let out a deep breath.

"The banquet is in two hours. Your ranking among the other initiates, Dauntless-born included, will be announced then. Good luck," Eric says.

The Dauntless leaders walk out of the room, leaving me with Tris. I beckon towards her to follow me into the Pit. I feel her wary eyes on me, and I flash her a comforting smile.

"I heard a rumor that you only had seven obstacles to face. Practically unheard of," I say, hoping she doesn't hate me forever.

Her gaze fills with surprise. "You… you weren't watching the simulation?"

I feel a prick of pain in my gut.

"Only on the screens. The Dauntless leaders are the only ones who see the whole thing. They seemed impressed," I say quietly. She's relieved I didn't see that she was afraid of me.

She's afraid of me.

"Well, seven fears isn't as impressive as four, but it will suffice," she says humorously.

"I would be surprised if you weren't ranked first," I say.

We walk into the glass room, and people point at Tris, but she stays close to my side.

"I have a question," she asks suddenly, biting her lip. I feel my muscles tense. "How much did they tell you about my fear landscape?"

"Nothing really," I lie. "Why?"

"No reason," she says, kicking a pebble.

"Do you have to go back to the dormitory? Because if you want peace and quiet, you can stay with me until the banquet," I say quietly.

I feel her tense beside me, and I bite the inside of my cheek to hold back the pain.

"What is it?" I ask softly.

"Let's go," she says with a smile, and I can't help but smile back.

* * *

I close the door behind us and slide of my shoes once we reach my apartment.

"Want some water?" I ask.

"No thanks," she holds her hands out.

"You okay?" I say, touching her cheek, cradling her face.

I smile, leaning down. I press my lips softly to hers, feeling the electrifying heat from her face flood through my veins.

My lips still on hers, I slide her jacket from her shoulder. She flinches under my gaze. She pushes me back, her eyes tearing up.

I feel tears burning behind my closed eyelids, but I blink them away before she notices.

I was right. She is afraid of me.

"What? What's wrong?"

She shakes her head.

I feel a chill down my back.

"Don't tell me it's nothing," my voice feels cold as I speak. I know what it is. She doesn't like me. She's afraid of me. "Hey," I whisper. "Look at me."

She pulls her hands from her pockets and lifts her hands upwards. The anger clenched in my jaw hurts.

She looks into my eyes, surprise filling her features. Why is she so surprised that she can hurt me?

"Sometimes I wonder what's in it for you. This… whatever it is." Her voice wobbles with worry and fear.

"What's in it for me," I repeat. Does she mean… _sex_? I take a step back, shaking my head softly. "You're an idiot, Tris."

"I am _not_ an idiot," she says quietly. "Which is why I know that it's a little weird that, of all the girls you could have chosen, you chose me. so if your just looking for… um, you know… _that_…"

I can't help but laugh in my head. She's so cute when she gets all flustered.

"What? Sex?" I scowl softly. "You know, if that was all I wanted, you probably wouldn't have been the first person I would go to."

The effect of my words on her is instantaneous. She nearly doubles over, holding her hands to her stomach, blinking back tears.

"I'm going to leave now," she says quietly, turning to the door.

"No, Tris," I whisper. She misunderstood me. I grab her wrist, pulling her back towards me, but she pulls away. I grab her other wrist, holding our crossed arms between us.

"I'm sorry I said that," I say quietly. "What I _meant_ was that you aren't like that. Which I knew when I met you."

"You were an obstacle in my fear landscape. Did you know that?"

_So she is afraid of me._

"What?" I release her arms. "You're _afraid_ of me?" I suppose, before it was confirmed, the idea didn't scare me as bad. I wasn't totally sure. Hell, it could have been Peter, or Al, or some other creep in her landscape that she was afraid of. Now the idea stings me on a whole new level. It really was me that scared her.

"Not you," she whispers, biting her lip. "Being with you… with anyone. I've never been involved with someone before, and… you're older, and I don't know what your expectations are, and…"

Before the words start tumbling out of her lips, I stop her.

"Tris," I say sternly, trying to keep giggly relief from spilling from my lips, "I don't know what delusion you're operating under, but this is all new to me, too."

"Delusion?" she repeats. "You mean you haven't…" she raises her eyebrows in surprise. What is so surprising about me not having had sex with someone else? "Oh. _Oh._ I just assumed… Um. You know."

"Well, you assumed wrong." I look away from her, embarrassment flooding my cheeks. What did she think I was, a male stripper? "You can tell me anything, you know. I am kinder than I seemed in training. I promise."

I take her face in my hands.

She nods at me softly.

I kiss her between the eyebrows, and then on the tip of her nose, then I carefully press my lips to hers.

She presses her lips into mine, and I hope she doesn't hear my sigh of relief. She doesn't hate me. She isn't afraid of me.

My fingers slide across her shoulders, and my right hand comes across a bandage.

"Are you hurt?" I ask, trying not to let concern flow so much through my words.

"No. It's another tattoo. It's healed, I just… wanted to keep it covered up," she says quietly.

"Can I see?"

She nods tersely. She pulls her arm out of her sleeve, and I try not to let the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. I run my hand softly over her shoulder, fingering the bandage. I feel her shaking below my fingers, and I hope she can't feel my rapid pulse through my thumbs.

I peel the bandage away, not surprised to find the symbol of Abnegation on her shoulder.

I smile softly at her. "I have the same one," I say, my voice increasing to a laugh. "On my back."

"Really? Can I see?"

I press the bandage back to her shoulder, pulling her shirt softly over it.

"Are you asking me to undress, Tris?" I say, laughing.

A nervous laugh escapes her throat. "Only… partially."

I frown, pulling my shirt over my head. I avert my eyes, my cheeks flushing.

"What is it?" she asks, frowning.

"I don't invite many people to look at me," I say quietly. "Any people, actually."

"I can't imagine why," she says softly. "I mean, look at you."

I feel her gaze fall upon my back, and my cheeks feel warm.

"I think we made a mistake," I whisper. "We've all started to put down the virtues of the other faction sin the process of bolstering our own. I don't want to do that. I want to be brave, and selfless, _and_ smart, _and_ kind, _and_ honest." I clear my throat. "I continually struggle with kindness."

"No one's perfect," she whispers. "It doesn't work that way. One bad thing goes away, and another bad thing replaces it."

I feel her fingers brush over the Abnegation symbol on my back, and goose bumps follow the trail of her fingertips. "We have to warn them, you know," her voice feels quiet.

"I know," I whisper. "We will."

I turn towards her, and she reaches her hand out, then she pulls back.

"Is this scaring you, Tris?" I ask nervously.

"No," she says, voice cracking. "Not really. I'm only… afraid of what I want."

I frown. "What do you want?" Then I realise it. She wants _me_. I feel the muscles in my face contract, tightening around my jaw. "Me?"

She nods slowly.

I smile softly, nodding in pace. I take her hands gently in mine, guiding them smoothly over my abdomen. My muscles tighten, my eyelids fluttering like a schoolgirl. _Pull it together!_ I guide her hands up my chest, ignoring the tremble of my heartbeat. Her cheeks flush red as she reaches her palms all the way to the back of my neck.

"Someday," I whisper, "if you still want me, we can…" I pause, clearing my throat anxiously. "We can…"

She smiles at me, cutting off all movement in my vocal chords. She presses her cheek to my chest and I can hear her heartbeat, in synch with mine.

"Are you afraid of me, too, Tobias?" she asks softly.

I chuckle to myself.

"Terrified."

She turns, pressing her lips to the hollow beneath my neck. I feel the hairs on the back of my neck rise.

"Maybe you won't be in my fear landscape anymore," she whispers, more like a murmur, really.

I bend my head down, kissing her slowly. I feel all signs of panic and pain leave my body.

"Then everyone can call you Six," I whisper, laughing.

"Four and Six," she says.

I bend down, kissing her lips, my arm around her waste, her hand on my chest, and it seems like she fits perfectly, like the final piece of the puzzle that is I, Tobias Eaton. _Tobias Eaton_ feels strange to me. Tobias Eaton was the scared, scarred little Abnegation boy, who could barely hold a knife. Four, my Dauntless persona, is the man Tris Prior knew, and was able to unravel with one press of her lips. Four is the shield that I hid behind when exposing my inner skin was no longer an option for me. Sometimes it is nice to be Tobias Eaton, just like Tris is able to be Beatrice Prior every once and a while. But I'm not Tobias Eaton, not anymore.

_Four and Six…_ Suddenly I can taste it. Life with Beatrice Prior. I had never really planned to amount to anything before. I had planned to go through the motions, live with the cowardice that I showed by leaving Marcus. But here, in the moment, I see something coming. Something I never expected to see.

I see a light at the end of the tunnel.


	24. Four-lorn ch 24

**A/N: So I mentioned in my last chapter what I planned to do with this fic, and I wanted to let y'alls know that you can PM me if you have any questions or suggestions, (also please PM/Review with ideas for my next POV story, I'm thinking The Mortal Instruments in Jace's or Isabelle's POV, but I really want to hear ideas!)**

**Thank you SO much to everyone who has reviewed! It means so much to me that my writing is appreciated, and I love to hear what y'alls have to say! Look forward to writing more for you guys in the future!**

**Without further adieu, the next chapter of my fanfiction!**

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 32**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy. Or the characters. Or even the quotes. Damn.**

* * *

I feel Tris's eyes on me as we walk down to the dining hall. A smile stretches wide across my lips as I think about the last two hours. We spent them lying on my bed talking, sleeping, and _kissing._ Now we head to find out the rankings. Of course, Eric already told me, and she's ranked first.

I see her lovely gray eyes flicker up to mine, and I greet her with a smile.

When we reach the entrance, we split. I wait for her to walk in, then I count to ten, then I go and sit by Zeke.

I hear Christina say, "Where did you go? Everyone else went back to the dormitory."

I feel my muscles tense. What would be the harm in telling them now?

"I just wandered around. I was too nervous to talk to everyone else about it," Tris says evasively.

"You have no reason to be nervous," Christina replies, shaking her head. She's right. "I turned around to talk to Will for one second, and you were already done."

Christina sounds jealous. _She should be, Tris is kick ass._ I shake my head quickly, earning a look from Zeke.

"What job are you going to pick?" Tris asks with a shrug.

"I'm thinking I might want a job like Four's. Training initiates. Scaring the living daylights out of them." I feel the corners of my lips tug upwards. Christina's spunk is just what the initiates need. I would like to work with her very much. "You know, fun stuff. What about you?"

"I guess… I could be an ambassador to the other factions," she says quietly. "I think being a transfer would help me."

I feel my smile widen. Beatrice Prior, ambassador of Dauntless. I like it.

"I was so hoping you would say Dauntless-leader-in training," Christina says wistfully.

I begin to tune them out as I lose myself in this delicious cake.

Something brings me back to light.

"Question," I hear Christina's loud voice ring through my ears. "The leaders who were watching your fear landscape… they were laughing about something."

I feel my muscles tense, and Zeke stares.

"You okay?" he asks. I nod tersely.

"Oh?" Tris asks, biting her lip. "I'm glad my terror amuses them."

"Any idea which obstacle it was?" she asks. I feel myself sit up straight. _Don't tell her don't tell her don't tell her._

"No," Tris says unconvincingly.

Once a Candor, always a Candor. I find Christina proving this true here and now.

"You're _lying_," she says. "You always bite the inside of your cheek when you lie. It's your tell."

Tris's cheeks suddenly expand, as though she let go of them with her teeth.

"Will's is pinching his lips together, if it makes you feel better," she adds as an afterthought. Will covers his lips with his hands.

"Okay, fine," Tris says softly. I take in a deep breath. I tersely shove a forkful of cake into my mouth, chewing with robotic motions. Even the taste of delicious Dauntless cake isn't enough to distract me. "I was afraid of… intimacy," Tris continues.

"Intimacy," Christina repeats. "Like… sex?"

Tris stiffens and nods, earning a giggle from will. I resist the urge to slap him.

"What was _that_ like? I mean, did someone just… try to do it with you? Who was it?" Damn the Candor, for their never ending curiosity.

"Oh, you know. Faceless… unidentifiable male," she says nonchalantly. I feel a weight lift off my chest, and I visibly relax.

Zeke looks quizzically at me, and I shove a large bite of cake in my mouth, raising an eyebrow, and he falls out of his chair laughing.

I hear a microphone squeal, and Eric is behind me. He coughs self-consciously into the microphone, scratching the back of his neck.

"We aren't big on speeches here. Eloquence is for Erudite," he says. The crowd laughs, and I take a bite of cake to avoid having to react. "So I'm going to keep this short. It's a new year, and we have a new pack of initiates. And a slightly smaller pack of new members. We offer them our congratulations." People begin pounding their fists. "We believe in bravery. We believe in taking action. WE believe in freedom from hear and in acquiring the skills to force the bad out of our world so that the good can prosper and thrive. If you also believe in those things, we welcome you."

I smile and cheer, this time for real. I _do_ believe in those things.

"Tomorrow," Eric continues, "in their first act as members, our top ten initiates will choose their professions, in the order of how they are ranked. The rankings, I know, are what everyone is really waiting for. They are determined by a combination of three scores—the first, from the combat stage of training; the second, from the simulation stage; and the third, from the final examination, the fear landscape. The ranking will appear on the screen behind me."

I don't even look. I keep my eyes on Tris. Her shoulders slouch and she smiles. _She did it._

I see Christina and Will hug her in turn, and then she taps Uriah's shoulder.

"Congratulations!" she shouts.

"You beat them!" he shouts back, laughing, as Christina and Will kiss each other sloppily. I walk to the table, standing behind Tris.

"You think giving you a hug would give away too much?" I whisper.

"You know," she says, dragging the words. "I really don't care."

She stands on her toes, and presses her lips to mine. At first, I recoil in surprise. Then I relax, pressing back into her kiss. I feel my hand go to her neck, brushing the bandage. Suddenly she stiffens and pulls back. Her eyes widen.

"Tris?" I ask.

"Not now," she whispers. "Later. Okay?"

I nod softly, acutely aware of Will and Christina, staring wide-eyed and open-mouthed at me.

Tris gets up and leaves.

"So," Christina starts, and then her voice fails her. I smile. I finally got a Candor to shut up.

"I'm going to go…" Will trails off, "and grab us some cake. Be right back."

He kisses Christina's cheek and walks away, stopping after a few steps to shake his head quickly and stare quizzically at me.

Christina still doesn't move.

"So," she tries again.

"So," I respond.

"You and Tris," she says.

"Me and Tris," I respond.

"Wow," she says.

"Yep," I respond.

Then she stands up and leaves. Before going, she turns and adds, "Break her heart, and we kill you."

I smile.

"Don't worry. I won't."

If anything, she will be the one to break mine.


	25. Four-lorn ch 25

**A/N: Well, here it is. My final update of 2013. *choked sob* it was ****_so_**** nice to spend the better part of this year writing for you guys, it has been a real pleasure. I have never met nicer people, readers, or reviewers, so THANK YOU so much for everything! See you on the other side, bitches!**

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 33**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters (they would all be ****_living_**** in happiness right now), but either way, enjoy!**

* * *

It's midnight when I hear the stomping. I run to my closet, grabbing a t-shirt and jeans, lacing my shoes with quick, delicate fingers.

_What is all the commotion?_

Grabbing my gun, I holster it and bolt out the door, forgetting to even lock it. People of every age and gender are getting up and walking in the same direction.

What the hell? It's like… _It's like everyone in Dauntless is getting up,_ I realize. _Oh, no…_ Eric. This is his way to get us to fight. It's the simulation. My fist impacts with the wall. Not a head turns. _They're under some sort of simulation…_

I wave my hand in front of a random woman's face. No reaction. They move in absolute unison, not a step out of line.

_What do I do? What do I do!_

The small part in the back of my brain is the only part still functional. _Just walk. Do what they do._

I find myself in a line with Zeke in front of me, and Uriah in front of him. _What the hell is Uriah doing all the way over here?_ Then I see his hand. It's drumming a beat against his knee.

Oh.

He's Divergent.

"Uriah, quit it," I whisper. His hand goes still and his neck straightens.

"Don't turn," I whisper again. "Just keep walking."

He must have come to find his brother.

His head gives an almost unperceivable nod, and then I lose him in the crowd.

I walk at their pace towards the guns, picking one up with Zeke's exact hand motions, eyeing the crowd for Tris. She's Divergent. She'll be awake. I holster another gun, hiding the one already in the holster in my shoe. Then I follow Zeke to the train. Standing in the train car, I see Tris be helped up.

Oh no. She's fumbling too much and shaking. I force my face to stay blank, making my way towards her, trying not to stir up too much attention.

I see her face fall in disappointment when she sees me. _Am I really that good at this?_ Obviously she isn't. It's clear that she doesn't belong. Tears are beginning to form in her eyes. I need to do something before she gets us both killed.

Quickly, and without thinking, I slide my hand into hers. I feel her visibly tense, and a ghost of a smile forms on her face. She keeps her eyes pointed forward, as do I.

I slide my thumb in a slow circle around the back of her hand, causing tension in my arm from the electricity. I try to relax her, but she feels tenser.

When we reach the stop for Abnegation, I turn to Tris.

"Run," I say quickly, every last hope of us living remaining in my eyes.

"My family," she whispers back. Then she looks ahead and jumps off the train. I jump of and walk in front of her.

After about a half of a mile, I hear the gunshots. I feel my hands clench, and I take a deep breath. _I hope it was Marcus,_ the Dauntless part of me thinks. _I hope that they missed,_ Abnegation responds. I shake my head to myself, not moving on the exterior. Why do I care if he got shot? He isn't my responsibility. He isn't my dad, not really.

I feel Tris clench beside me and every part of me wants to stop everything and hold her. To stop all this pretense and lies. But I can't, I can't for our lives. My gaze follows hers as I see Tori beating the crap out of a fallen council member.

"This is insane," I hear to my right. Hairs rise on the back of my neck as I place a name to the sound. Eric. He stops by Tris and pokes her cheek and it takes every last impulse in my body to hold myself in place. More than anything I want to reach out and slap him so hard he doesn't see straight anymore.

"They can't really see us? Or hear us?" A voice asks. I don't recognize it.

"Oh, they can see and hear. They just aren't processing what they see and hear the same way. They receive transmitters we injected them with…" Eric presses his finger harshly into the adhesive bandage on Tris's neck. I feel my nostrils flare and I hope that Eric doesn't notice. "… and carry them out seamlessly."

Eric takes a step to the right, looking at me. He leans in close, grinning.

"Now this is a happy sight," he says. I try not to flinch. "The legendary Four. No one's going to remember that I came in second now, are they?" He says it almost like he _knows_ I can hear him. "No' one's going to ask me, 'What was it like to train with the guy who has only _four fears?_'" He draws his gun and presses it to my temple. I can hear Tris's heartbeat. "Think anyone would notice if he got shot?" I take a silent, deep breath.

Many would doubt that Eric would actually shoot me. But I don't.

"Go ahead," the woman says. "He's nothing now."

"Too bad you didn't just take Max up on his offer, Four. Well too bad for _you_, anyway," he says quietly, clicking the bullet into the chamber.

Then I hear a click, and I hold my steady. Why haven't my brains been blown out?

"Get your gun away from his head," I hear Tris say.

"You won't shoot me," Eric replies.

"Interesting theory," she replies, but she doesn't shoot him in the head. She shoots his foot, and I hear him scream in pain. I pull out my gun and shoot the woman in the leg.

Tris grabs my arm and pulls me away.

Then I hear it. A shot rings out into the night and a scream so chilling fills my ears. I turn and see Tris lying on the ground, chin scraping the pavement.

For a horrid moment, I think she's dead, and I'm unable to move. Then I see her face turn, and I let out a loud sigh. Checking to see if anyone else is behind me, I run towards her, picking her up softly.

"Run," she whispers to me. She expects me to _leave_ her?

"No," I reply as calmly as I can.

In seconds we are surrounded, but not once will I even _think_ of leaving her side. Never.

I help her up as the Dauntless soldiers surround us.

"Divergent rebels," Eric says, his face turning white from blood loss. "Surrender your weapons."


	26. Four-lorn ch 26

**A/N: Happy 2014 everyone! Sorry it took me a while to update, this chapter was a long one, and the ending was hard to write. **

**So, if you wouldn't mind, I have a teensy favour to ask y'alls (not very Abnegation of me, I know, sorry, but it's really important to me, so please hear me out :P). Currently, doesn't allow stories to be posted in Welsh, so imagine my annoyance when I spent three hours writing a story and then translating it into Welsh (I speak a bit of Welsh, I'm still learning, so I had to use a translator for a small portion, and it took a while to get it right), and then I went to publish it, and there was NO WELSH language choice! I emailed the support email (support *AT* fanfiction *DOT* com), and I got a reply asking to spread the word, so ****_PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE_**** if you value my writing, PLEASE email them using the [category] tag and ask them to add Welsh as a language (New Language: Welsh:Cymraeg)**

**THANK YOU SO MUCH I REALLY APPRECIATE IT! It means so much to me!**

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 34**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters.**

**Also, creds to ****_QueenOfOlympus223_**** for the line "The light at the end of the tunnel turned out to be a freight train." Genius. Thanks. :P**

* * *

With every step we take my heartbeat increases. I can _feel_ Tris's breath becoming shallower as she digs her shoulder into mine, leaning into me. I hold her hand like it's a lifeline, trying to get her to hang on.

_Please, Tris. Just hang on a little longer._

I can hear her blood hit the ground. Every droplet causes a spike of pain down my spine.

I see Eric's gun pressed to her spine. He doesn't need to press one to mine, the gun on her back is enough to make me do anything he wants, and he knows it.

He shoves us towards two men, dressed in Dauntless black, who guard a door.

I recognize the one on the left as George, the man who helps me run the video monitors. I look for any sign of life in his eyes, but he just stares on mindlessly.

Shame. He was a nice guy.

Once inside, I see a blonde woman sitting behind a desk. Immediately my brain puts a name to the face. _Jeanine._ Even though we haven't met personally, I recognize her face, even her _voice_ from description. Hers is the voice in the aptitude system.

"Well send some of them _back_ on the train, then," she says into a phone. "It needs to be well guarded, it's the most important part—I'm not talk—I have to go," she snaps, shutting the phone. Her piercing gray eyes skirt over Tris's slumped figure.

"Divergent rebels," the man behind me says.

"Yes I can see that," she snaps, taking off her glasses and leaving them folded nicely on the table. "_You,_" she says, pointing at Tris, "I expected. All the trouble with your aptitude test results made me suspicious from the beginning. But _you_…"

Her eyes flick to me. I feel a cold shiver go up my spine.

"You, Tobias—or should I call you Four?—managed to elude me," she says quietly. "Everything about you checked out: test results, initiation simulations, everything. But here you are nonetheless," she says, folding her hands and resting her chin on them. "Perhaps you could explain to me how that is?"

Surprising even myself, my voice is calm when I answer. "You're the genius. Why don't you tell me?"

She smiles softly, filling me with dread. I focus on not showing it, though.

"My theory is that you really do belong in Abnegation. That your Divergence is weaker," she says, her smile widening.

I feel bile rise in my throat. I feel Tris stiffen against me, then suddenly weaken. I wrap my arm tighter around her, squeezing her hand. She squeezes back to let me know she's okay.

"Your powers of deductive reasoning are stunning," I spit out. "Consider me awed."

I feel Tris's head turn against my shoulder, and she looks at me in spite of all that keeps her still. I feel my cheeks burn at her gaze, hopeful that no one sees.

"Now that your intelligence has been verified, you might want to get on with killing us," I say, closing my eyes. "You have a lot of Abnegation leaders to murder, after all."

She continues to smile and stand, yet I see the glimmer of annoyance in her eye.

I feel Tris slump, her eyes rolling back in her head, and I slide my arm around her waist to support her. I feel her pulse in my hand, letting out a nervous breath.

"Don't be silly," Jeanine says lightly. "There is no rush. You are both here for an extremely important purpose. You see, it perplexed me that the Divergent were immune to the serum that I developed, so I have been working to remedy that. I thought I might have, with the last batch, but as you know, I was wrong. Luckily I have another batch to test."

"Why bother?" I whisper. I'm still in awe at her comment. "_But as you know, I was wrong._" She must _really_ think we are of no importance if she admitted to us that she was _wrong_.

Her smirk brings me back.

"I have had a question since I began the Dauntless project, and it is this," she says, sidestepping her desk, skimming the surface with her finger. "Why are most of the Divergent weak-willed, God-fearing nobodies from _Abnegation_, of all factions?"

"Weak-willed," I scoff. "It requires a _strong_ will to manipulate a simulation, last time I checked. Weak-willed is mind-controlling an army because it's too hard for you to train one yourself."

I hope my comments bite behind her mask.

"I am not a fool," she says. "A faction of intellectuals is no army. WE are tired of being dominated by a bunch of self-righteous idiots who reject wealth and advancement, but we couldn't do this on our own. And your Dauntless leaders were all too happy to oblige me if I guaranteed them a place in our new, improved government."

My mind flickers to Eric and Max.

"Improved," I snort.

"Yes, improved," Jeanine says. "Improved, and working toward a world in which people will live in wealth, comfort, and prosperity."

"At whose expense?" Tris asks, her voice sounding alarmingly sluggish. "All that wealth… doesn't come from nowhere."

"Currently, the factionless are a drain on the resources. As is Abnegation. I am sure that once the remains of your old faction are absorbed into the Dauntless army, Candor will cooperate and we will finally be able to get on with things," Jeanine says, as if this is the most obvious thing in the world.

_Absorbed…_ she wants to mind control the Abnegation.

"Get on with thinks," I repeat angrily. "Make no mistake. You will be dead before the day is out, you—"

Jeanine cuts me off before some very nasty words escape my lips.

"Perhaps if you could control your temper," she says, words clear and sharp, "you would not be in this situation to begin with, Tobias."

"I'm in this situation because you put me here," I snap. "The second you orchestrated an attack against innocent people."

"Innocent people," Jeanine says with a laugh. With dread, I know where she is taking this conversation. "I find that a little funny, coming from you. I would expect Marcus's son to understand that not all those people are innocent. Can you tell me honestly that you wouldn't be happy to discover that your father was killed in the attack?"

"No," I answer honestly, teeth gritted. "But at least his evil didn't involve the widespread manipulation of an entire faction and the systematic murder of every political leader we have."

My eyes lock with Jeanine's, and I dare myself to hold her gaze. I feel Tris stiffening at my side at the unease caused by our staring contest.

Her eyes flick to the floor as she clears her throat.

"What I was going to say, is that soon, dozens of the Abnegation and their young children will be my responsibility to keep in order, and it does not bode well for me that a large number of them may be Divergent like yourselves, incapable of being controlled by simulations."

She steps to the left.

"Therefore, it was necessary that I develop a new form of simulation to which they are not immune. I have been forced to reassess my own assumptions. That is where you come in."

She steps back to the right.

"You are correct to say that you are strong-willed. I cannot control your will. But there are a few things I can control."

I feel Tris's forehead dig into my shoulder as her blood spills onto the floor.

I think what surprises me most is the look on Jeanine's face. She doesn't look angry that there are people that defy her. She doesn't look like a woman who wants to control an army, although that is what she is. She looks genuinely interested in what makes the Divergent tick, like she wants blueprints. She simply looks curious.

"I can control what you see and hear," she continues. "So I created a new serum that will adjust your surroundings to manipulate your will. Those who refuse to accept our leadership must be closely monitored. You will be the first test subject, Tobias. Beatrice, however…" she smiles, and I feel my heart drop through my chest as she chooses her next words. "You are too injured to be of much use to me, so your execution will occur at the conclusion of this meeting."

I feel her shiver, and my body matches it. I feel my heartbeat in my head, although my heart is on the floor. It's all I can hear, the sound of my heart beating, the blood coursing through my ears.

"No," I say, my voice trembling more than I'd like, but I can't help it. "I would rather die."

"I'm afraid you don't have much of a choice in the matter," she says lightly, like our _lives_ don't matter to her.

The light, the light at the end of the tunnel that I had _just_ seen, turned out to be a freight train.

I am aware of one thing, one thing that I must do, not for Tris's sake, but for my own.

I take her face in my hands, kissing her desperately, trying with all my might to hang on to our final seconds together. I lose myself in her lips, and I feel the impatient stare of Jeanine on the back of my neck.

I let go of Tris softly, careful not to hurt her with the rage tightening in my muscles.

I launch myself with all my strength across the desk, wrapping my long fingers around Jeanine's throat. Tris's scream barely registers in my mind.

It takes two Dauntless soldiers to pull me off of Jeanine. They hold me down to the carpet, and I see Tris blunder towards them.

"No," I whisper. No one hears me.

They force her against the wall.

I feel a gun smack into the back of my head, and I let out a noise that feels like nails on a chalkboard, a noise I didn't think I was capable of making.

All those hours, wasted in the Dauntless gym training, _preparing_ for this moment are now useless to me.

I feel the needle plunge into my neck, and I look up at a horrified face.

Who is that girl?

I am sure I have seen her before. Her blonde hair is slick with blood, and her face stares back at me.

"Let him up," Jeanine says, voice scratchy. I stand slowly as the guard lets go of me.

"Tobias," the girl whispers. Then her voice gets stronger. "Tobias!"

_Why is she calling my name?_

"He doesn't know you," Jeanine says.

Suddenly I remember.

This is the girl that tried to kill me.

I start towards her, slamming her into the wall, wrapping my fingers around her throat. _Why_ can't I bring myself to draw them all the way around?

This situation feels wrong. I _know_ she tried to kill me, I know the memory is there, but I can't recall it.

Two guards pull me off of the girl.

I still can't remember her name.

"The simulation manipulates him by altering what he sees—making him confuse enemy with friend."

What?

The girl looks at me, her blue eyes filling with unspeakable pain. Those eyes… I swear I have seen those eyes before. They fill me with an unexplainable comfort, and part of me wants to comfort her.

But why? Why is she so sad that I tried to hurt her? Didn't she try to kill me? What did she expect, for me to forgive her and hug her? No. She is my enemy.

Jeanine's words sink in. "_Making him confuse enemy with friend._" Does this mean… does this mean she is my _friend?_ No. No. She tried to _kill_ me. Why would she be my friend?

"The advantage to this version of the simulation is that he can act independently, and is therefore far more effective than a mindless soldier."

Jeanine's eyes flick towards the guard that hold me back from my nemesis.

"Send him to the control room. We'll want a sentient being there to monitor things and, as I understand it, he used to work there."

Used to work there… yes, I used to work there.

I feel the guards hit me over the head, dragging me to what must be the "control room," and before I pass out, I can't help but feel one thing.

Maybe the blonde didn't try to kill me. Maybe this was all Jeanine. Maybe.


	27. Four-lorn ch 27

**A/N: Exactly 1000 words, that's a relief. This chapter was kind of a risk, as I have exactly no clue how the hell these simulations work (obviously, I'm not Jeanine Matthews), so I kind of made it up as I went. Hope this is okay, please tell me what you think.**

**Also, as I mentioned in the last chapter, fanfiction STILL doesn't let me post in Welsh, and I have a story sitting in Doc Manager waiting to be posted until they can add it, so PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE email the support email (support ) and tag the 'Subject' like ([category] New Language: Welsh:Cymraeg) Thanks it means SO SO SO much to me! :)**

_**cookiemonster667: **_**Thank you so much for your kind review! I have absolutely ****_no _****intention of abandoning this fanfiction, I love writing, (even if I can't write in Welsh), and this is one of my favorite hobbies. **

_**QueenOfOlympus223: **_**Oh damn, did I cut the line out on accident? I might not have done a very good copy-and-paste job, but it isn't at the end of the story, it's more in the middle, right around the line "I don't believe you have a choice in the matter." Please tell me if it still isn't showing up, I'd like to know. Thanks for pointing that out to me! **

**Anyway, enough of my time, enjoy this next update!**

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 35**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy, or any of the characters. Only George is my creation. Poor George. Maybe I'll write a special side fic about George-who-happens-to-be-in-all-of-my-stories.**

* * *

After a couple of hours, the blonde finally wakes up. I don't understand why they don't just kill her in her sleep, but I'm okay with watching, as long as she's killed. She tried to kill me, I want to see her killed. Right?

The lights above her flicker, and she looks around, getting a bearing on her surrounds. It's hard to tell where she is in the building, being that the security camera labels have been removed, but I can tell she's in a thick glass tank.

As soon as she realizes she's in a tank, she starts to panic. When I say panic, I mean full on _panic_. Her fingertips tremble, her eyes dart around, it's almost like she's full on _afraid_ of this.

The memory hits me so hard I almost fall out of the chair.

_I see her in a glass box in the initiate training room. Other initiates surround her. She pounds her hands on the glass as the water level rises slowly._

_"Hey," she calls. "Let me out of here!"_

_The water slides up her calves. She pounds on the glass._

_"Get me out of here!" The water reaches her thighs as the two initiates closest laugh at her. _

_"Help!" she screams. "Please! Please help!"_

_Dread fills my veins. _

_She floats to the top, and for one horrible moment, I think she's dead. Then she gasps for the last inch of the air. _

_The simulation is all in your head._

The simulation is all in your head.

Why was I so scared for her? Was I… was I her _trainer?_

That would explain why I was overseeing her training. But why was I so scared for her?

She slams her heel into the wall, over and over until she is screaming in pain. It burns me inside, and the worst part is, I don't even know why. It _shouldn't_ hurt. But it does.

Her hands drop to her side. Defeat. Acceptance. I don't know what.

Water begins to fill to her thighs.

She stares right at the camera. Right at _me._

And then she lets go, floating in the water.

Why?

Then I see a woman standing in front of the cage. She wears Abnegation grey, tainted with other people's blood.

Natalie Prior.

"Beatrice. Beatrice we have to run," she says. How does she know this mystery Beatrice? Hell, how do _I_ know this mystery Beatrice?

They run down the hallway, and I avert my eyes towards the hallway cameral.

"Mom," Beatrice says. So that's how they know each other. The mystery Beatrice was Abnegation. "You were Dauntless."

"Yes. And it has served me well today. Your father and Caleb and some others are hiding in a basement at the intersection of North and Fairfield. We have to go get them." Natalie's voice is soft and kind, and I want to go find it. It sounds like a motherly voice. "There will be time for questions. Now we must go."

She offers Beatrice a gun, and they take off towards Abnegation.

Redirecting the cameras so I can follow their movements, I watch as they pause in the basement of the Abnegation government building.

"How did you know where to find me?" the blonde asks. I don't like the name 'Beatrice', it doesn't really suit her. It's so… _Abnegation._

"I've been watching the trains since the attacks started. I didn't know what I would do when I found you. But it was always my intention to save you." Natalie's voice sounds completely candid. I smile to myself.

I wonder what it's like to have a mother.

"But I betrayed you," Bea says. No, I don't like Bea either. "I left you."

"You're my daughter. I don't' care about factions. Look where they got us. Human beings as a whole cannot be good for long before the bad creeps in and poisons us again."

Natalie has that right. I mean, her daughter, who seems like a decent enough person, tried to kill me.

"Mom, how do you know about Divergence? What is it? Why…" the blonde's voice trails off. The blonde is what I have reduced to calling her. _The blonde._

Looking down at her gun, she says, "I know about them because I am one. I was only safe because my mother was a Dauntless leader. On Choosing Day, she told me to leave my faction and find a safer one. I chose Abnegation. But I wanted you to make the choice on your own."

_Lies,_ the inner voice inside me says. It's obviously a lie.

"I don't understand why we're such a threat to the leaders," the blonde says, staring out in wonder.

I begin to tune Natalie Prior out as she drabbles on. Echoes of words bounce around my mind.

_"We believe in ordinary acts of bravery, in the courage that drives one person to stand up for another."_

_"Becoming fearless isn't the point. It's learning how to control your fear, and how to be free from it."_

_"I have a theory that selflessness and bravery aren't all that different."_

_"I might be in love with you."_

The final line runs through my brain over and over again. Who said that? Did _I_ say that? Who was I talking to?

_"Are you afraid of me too, Tobias?"_

_"Terrified."_

The context feels wrong.

_"I'm going to kill you, Tobias."_

It feels more like a wrote thought than an expressive memory.

_"Four and Six…"_

Four and Six.

The sound of a gun shakes me back to reality. I see Natalie Prior go rigid on screen, and then she collapses, the world painting her red.

The blonde goes still as Dauntless start to run, but she ducks, and they run past.

Suddenly, my mind knows exactly what to call this girl.

_Tris._

Yes. I like Tris. It suits her.

Maybe I should tell Jeanine where Tris is going. Maybe I will, but for now something stays my hand.

Something tells me to let Tris Prior go.


	28. Four-lorn ch 28

**A/N: This is the first of two updates for me today, since this one is so short, I'm posting a second chapter in about 1/2 hour. Enjoy**

**Chapter of Divergent (the actual book): 38 (sorry I skipped 37, it was short and Tobias wasn't there)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent series or any of the characters**

* * *

After a couple of hours of watching Tris Prior run down corridors and escape Dauntless guards, I finally get bored of figuring out the mystery girl. I switch the computer screen in front of me into a coded mechanism, and I attempt to begin decoding.

Every hour, on the hour, I check my gun. Loaded. Back to decoding.

After several hours of this, I decide to finally give in to my bleary eyes and I close them, allowing my mind to drift into the realms of sleep.

I am awoken by one voice, and one voice alone.

"Tobias," it whispers.

* * *

I snap my head to the side, standing and raising my gun.

"Drop your weapon," I say, my voice a monotone.

"Tobias," she says, her voice pitching with emotion, "you're in a simulation."

"Drop your weapon," I repeat. "Or I'll fire."

She slides the gun down to her feet.

"Drop your weapon!" I call again. But she already had.

"I did," she says quietly. She sounds… scared. I see her race towards me as she grabs hold of my wrist, ducking the bullet I send towards her.

_It's time for you to die, bitch._

Suddenly, the gun slides from my hands. Did I really just say that?

The thought feels like it belongs to someone else.

She kicks me in the ribs. She dives for my gun. Unsure of what do, I push her away from the computers. I catch her foot and shove her towards the ground.

This is what I'm supposed to do, right?

I push her to the floor, yanking her pretty blonde hair, just like she had done with mine the night she attacked me.

"Tobias," she whispers, and the voice sounds so clear.

My grip falters, only for a second, but she notices. She kicks me in the shin, causing me to lose my grip entirely. She dives for the gun and grabs it.

"Tobias," she says, pointing. "I know you're in there somewhere."

As I begin to panic, I see something glint in her palm. _A bullet…_ She took the bullet out of the gun. Why would she take the bullet out of the gun?

It's almost like… _It's almost like she doesn't want to hurt me._

But she does. She does. She tried to kill me. She wants to hurt me!

_Who am I trying to convince here?_

"Tobias, please," she begs. Tears begin to run down her face. "Please. See me," I walk closer to her, taking soft, yet calculated steps. "Please see me, Tobias, please!"

I feel power in my step. A scowl spreads across my face, and I hope she can't see that my interior is cracking.

I press my gun to her forehead.

She presses her hand to my cheek.

I feel fire.

Then I feel fear. I _am_ afraid of Tris Prior.

I hear the bullet in her gun click into the chamber. _So she put the bullet back._

She closes her eyes, bracing herself for the bullet to fire. But it won't. At least, not from my gun.

I know, in my heart, that I am not strong enough to kill her.

I only have to hope she is not strong enough to kill me too.


	29. Four-lorn ch 29

**A/N: This right here, ladies and gentleman, is the final chapter of Divergent (the actual book, NOT THIS FICTION). My original plan was to end it here, but since this was so popular, I (of course) am going to continue into Insurgent. **

**Here's how my schedule is going to go. **

**Everything will be posted under this story title ('Four-lorn'). **

**The Insurgent chapters will be labelled ('Four-given')**

**Then, rather than doing Allegiant in the same manner, I will write a '20 years later' epilogue, following the events of Allegiant which I will not be writing about. This will be posted still under the same story title ('Four-lorn') but it will be called ('Four-ever')**

**So, in short, all in the ****same story doc****, it will go:**

**Divergent ('Four-lorn')**

**Insurgent ('Four-given', but posted as 'Four-lorn')**

**Epilogue following canon events of Allegiant ('Four-ever', but posted as 'Four-lorn')**

**Does that make sense? If it doesn't, feel free to shoot me a PM :)**

**Expect more from me tomorrow or Saturday! **

**Chapter of Divergent (wow now I'm going to have to start writing 'Chapter of Insurgent', that's going to be weird) (the actual book): 39 **

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters. **

* * *

The shot doesn't come. I can feel my heartbeat rising in synch with hers.

"Tobias," she whispers. "It's me."

She wraps her arm around me, and memories hit me like a blacksmith hitting a hammer.

_"Fine," I say, leaning closer to her face, my eyes locking on her lips. "I watched you because I like you."_

_"Did I hear you call me your boyfriend, Tris?"_

_"Then everyone can call you Six," I whisper, laughing._

_Four and Six…_

Four and Six.

I remember.

"Tris," I whisper, and I press my lips desperately into hers. I wrap my arms around her, lifting her up, drinking her in.

I feel a sob escape my lips, but I don't care.

"How did you do it?" she asks.

"I don't know," I say honestly. Because I really don't know. "I just heard your voice."

We turn to the computers.

"Was _I_ running the simulation?" I ask incredulously.

"I don't know if you were running it so much as monitoring it," she says, her voice still ragged from earlier. "It's already complete. I have no idea how, but Jeanine made it so it could work on it's own."

I shake my head slowly. "It's… incredible. Terrible, evil… but incredible."

I see Tris turn in horror towards one of the screens. I turn and follow her, and I see three faces that I absolutely do not want to see.

First is Tris's brother, Caleb. His face looks familiar to me, but not so much so that I would be able to pick him out of a crowd.

Second I see Peter. His face fills me with a feeling of disgust, but not so much disgust as the third face.

The third face is Marcus.

"Tobias," she says tersely. "Now!"

Did she come here _with_ Marcus?

She stares at something, looking horrified, and then I see the Dauntless guards. Running some code on the screen, everyone freezes.

"Tobias," she whispers.

Then they resume. Everyone looks back and forth, mouthing commands to each other, confused about what is going on, most likely. I pull of the side of the computer case.

"I have to get the data," I say hurriedly, "or they'll just start the simulation again."

Tris nods softly, her eyes trained on the screen. Surely there is a panicked frenzy happening.

"Got it," I say as soon as I have the data. I hand the hard drive to Tris, who slides it in her back pocket.

"We have to leave," she says, standing up.

"Yes, we do," I respond. _But not before I do this._

I slide my arm around her shoulders, feeling the electrifying waves of normality hit me.

As we near the elevator, Tris's eyes flicker to a pile of black-clothed bodies. They all surround one man who's dressed in grey.

I recognize the man as Andrew Prior.

Tris crouches next to him, brushing his hair back. I give her five seconds, and then we run.

Then we find Caleb. Releasing Tris's shoulders, she falls into her brother's arms.

"Dad?" he asks. I feel pity filling my gaze.

Tris shakes her head sadly.

"Well," Caleb says, choking on the word, "he would have wanted it that way."

Then I feel a prickle. A prickle down my spine that I haven't felt in over two years.

The prickle of my final fear.

"Son," my father sighs.

I feel a shudder go through my body, but I don't move.

"Hey," Tris says, stepping away from her brother. She shakes her wrist subconsciously, and I feel a whole new wave of guilt crash over me. She steps between us, pushing Marcus away. "Hey. Get away from him."

I can feel myself breathing down her neck.

"Stay away," she hisses again.

"Beatrice, what are you doing?" Caleb's brow furrows in confusion.

"Tris ," I whisper. _Don't get in the way,_ I intend to say. _Don't let him hurt you._ But I can't.

It isn't like it would have made that much difference. Even under simulation, I could see how utterly stubborn she is.

"Not all those Erudite articles were full of lies," she says bitterly.

"What are you talking about?" Marcus says quietly. "I don't know what you've been told, Beatrice, but—"

"The only reason I haven't shot you yet is because he's the one who should get to do it," she says angrily. I can't help but admire her for standing up to him. She is the bravest and most beautiful person I have ever seen. "Stay away from him or I'll decide I no longer care."

I feel my hands slide down her arm, squeezing her elbow.

"We have to go," I say unsteadily. "The train should be here any second."

We run towards the train. I see guilt flashing in her eyes as we wait for the next boxcar.

"Sorry," she whispers.

"You have nothing to be sorry for," I reply softly, taking her hand in mine. My fingers still shake from the encounter.

"If we take the train in the opposite direction, out of the city instead of in, we can get to Amity headquarters. That's where the others went." Her voice is soft and steady.

"What about Candor? What do you think they'll do?" Caleb's voice is as ever-curious as the Erudite. It's hard to believe he was ever Abnegation.

I pick Tris up, bridal style, and hold her in my arms. Her eyes close and she drifts off.

I feel Marcus's eyes on my back, trying to decode every last movement of mine. I'll bet by now he's probably figuring out that Tris and I are dating, if he hasn't already.

Tris's soft breath on my skin is the only thing keeping me from strangling him.

As the train comes, I slowly awaken Tris, setting her down on the pavement. She smiles gratefully at me, and she hurls herself onto the train.

I see Marcus go next, and he sits next to her.

Oh _hell_ no. I will _not_ let him touch her.

Swinging my legs over the edge, I sit firmly in between them. Better me then her. I pull Tris closely against me.

"My parents," she mumbles. "They died today. They died for _me_."

"They loved you," I whisper into her ear, her head leaning softly against my chest. "To them there was no better way to show you."

Her eyes skim my face.

"You nearly died today," I whisper. "I almost shot you. Why didn't you shoot me, Tris?" I feel guilt prickling my skin.

"I couldn't do that. It would have been like shooting myself."

I feel tears begin to well up, but I blink them away before anyone notices. Bringing my face so close to hers that our lips brush when I speak, I say the words that have been heaving on my chest since the day I threw knives at her.

"I have to tell you something."

She runs her fingers along my hands, and I try to ignore the shivers running down my spine.

"I might be in love with you." I feel a small smile form on my face, earning three severely quizzical looks. "I'm waiting until I'm sure to tell you, though."

I feel the eyes of Marcus, Peter, and Caleb trained on me, but I don't care.

"That's sensible of you," Tris says, laughing softly. "We should find some paper so you can make a list or a chart or something."

I slide my nose softly along her jaw, pressing my lips behind her ear.

"Maybe I'm already sure, and I just don't want to frighten you." That's a bit closer to the truth.

I wait in anticipation for her answer.

"Then you should know better."

"Fine," I whisper. "Then I love you."

I can almost feel the sarcastic remarks bubbling on Peter's lips, the scoff ready to escape Marcus's jaw, the gasp about to leave the traps of Caleb's mouth. But they don't.

I kiss her full on the lips, embracing every last second of this moment. I can feel the tension from our three viewers, but I don't care. For just one moment, Beatrice Prior is all mine, and I'm going to let the moment last.

This is my life now. This is my life with Beatrice Prior. It may be hectic, it may filled with drama, and fear, but that's okay.

And for once in my life, I think I like the life choice that I have made.

**TBC**

* * *

**Sorry to bother y'alls, one more thing. I just (finally) put up my Beta profile, so yay for that (if you need a Beta, I'm currently accepting requests), and it lists me as only being able to do English stories, but I can also do stories in Welsh, that just isn't an option because FFN STILL WON'T LET US POST STORIES IN WELSH (yes this will be mentioned in every chapter until they do :P) **

**I'm not going to be like 'I won't post until they let me write in Welsh', because I like to write too much and that feels a little mean, but PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE email the FFN support email (support *AT* fanfiction *DOT* com) and tag the 'Subject' line: [category] New Language: Welsh:Cymraeg**

**IT would mean SO FREAKING MUCH to me if you could do that thanks :D**

**Keep posted for the first ch. of Insurgent in Four's POV!**


	30. Four-given ch 1

**A/N: I feel like now would be a good time to point out that I have reached 97 followers, and I would just like to say thank you. I remember when I thought getting 10 followers was impossible, and it has literally been like number 1 on my bucket list to get 100 followers on a fanfiction, and I am very excited to be this close. Whoever my 100th follower is, you will get a special shout-out. **

**To thank you guys for being such great readers, I want to write a one shot of any chapter of Divergent, Insurgent, or Allegiant in any character's POV. Please review with the book, chapter, and character. I will literally do *any* chapter y'alls request, just send me a review or a PM!**

**Well then, now that I have finished Divergent, it is time to delve into the land of Insurgent! I hope y'alls enjoy!**

**Chapter of Insurgent (the actual book): 1**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters. **

**Second Disclaimer: This chapter is kind of short, mostly because the actual book chapter was really short too. Either way, here it is. Ch. 2 of Insurgent should be up soon. **

* * *

I crouch in front of Tris as she wakes up slowly, opening her eyes and adjusting to the light of the train.

"Tris come on," I say anxiously. "We have to jump."

She nods softly, and I help her off the train. When we hit the ground, I hear her moan softly, and her lip is ensnared in her teeth.

She stumbles over to where Caleb hit the ground.

"Okay?" she asks him. He nods in response.

"There are supposed to be Dauntless guards here," Marcus says angrily. Damn. I guess I didn't dream him being here. "Where are they?"

"They were probably under the simulation," I respond angrily, "and are now…" I pause in confusion. "Who knows where, doing who knows what."

Tris's hand flies to her back pocket as she re-assures herself that she still has the flash drive. She does.

"Let's hope the Erudite didn't think to change the combination," I say jokingly, typing in the code. The gate clicks open.

"How did you do that?" Caleb asks, sounding scared.

Oh, Caleb.

"I worked in the Dauntless control room, monitoring the security system. We only change the codes twice a year," I say matter-of-factly.

"How lucky," he says warily.

"Luck has nothing to do with it. I only worked there because I wanted to make sure I could get out," I say quietly.

I feel Tris shiver at my side and I wrap my arm around her.

Marcus holds Peter steady as Peter cradles his bloody arm. Caleb wipes his cheek every few seconds, probably crying. I see Tris continuously reach out to comfort him, but every time she pulls her hand back.

What a merry group we are.

Up ahead, pinpricks of light shine through the darkness as we make our way towards the Amity headquarters.

As we walk through the orchards, Marcus suddenly takes the lead.

"I know where to go," he says. I don't know how comfortable I feel about him leading us, but no one objects.

He leads us to a building and presses the doors open. No one stops us. The sound of squeaking shoes makes me want to vomit.

Marcus stops us by an open room, and a woman stands by the window. A name comes to my mind immediately.

_Johanna Reyes, Representative of Amity._

Her face is hard to forget. The scar that disfigures the left side of it is burned into my mind.

"Oh, thank God," she says when she sees my dad. _No, not my dad. Marcus._ She walks towards him like she was going to embrace him. I try not to gag. Rather than embracing him, she touches his shoulder, which is one of the fondest Abnegation gestures.

"The other members of your party got here a few hours ago, but they weren't sure if you had made it," she says quietly. _I almost wish he hadn't…_

Finally she takes her eyes off of Marcus and looks at everyone else.

"Oh my," she whispers, looking at Peter's blood-soaked shirt. "I'll send for a doctor. I can grant you all permission to stay the night, but tomorrow, our community must decide together. And they will likely not be enthusiastic about a Dauntless presence in our compound," she says, eyeing me suspiciously. "I of course have to ask you to turn over your weapons."

I hand my gun over suspiciously, but before Tris gets hers out of her waistband, I grab her hand to stop her. Covering up my actions, I lace my fingers with hers. It feels nice to hold her hand.

"My name is Johanna Reyes," Johanna says softly, extending her hand to Tris, and then to me. That's a more Dauntless gesture.

"This is T—" Marcus begins to introduce me, but I cut him off. He isn't my father anymore, he doesn't get the right to introduce me.

"My name is Four," I say quietly, smirking at Marcus's apparent anger. "This is Tris, Caleb, and Peter."

Johanna shoots me an approving look.

"Welcome to the Amity compound. Let us take care of you."

They do take care of us. They treat Peter's arm and Tris's shoulder. Then they lead us to the cafeteria.

Abnegation members line up to greet my father with smiles on their faces. He smiles and shakes every last person's hand.

Caleb immediately goes to the side of a blonde girl whom I have never seen.

Tris doesn't let go of my arm.

* * *

**Like I said, end of every fanfiction, this will be here:**

_**PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE email the FFN support (support*AT*fanfiction*DOT*com) about adding Welsh as a content language (it would mean A LOT to me, thanks :) ) (tag the 'Subject' line: [category]: New Language: Welsh:Cymraeg)**_


	31. Four-given ch 2

**Chapter of Insurgent (the actual book): 2**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent trilogy or any of the characters**

* * *

I feel my eyes, half open, fluttering, as they try to find something to stare at in the dark hallway. I walk deftly towards the door that harbors Tris.

Knocking softly, I hear her lovely voice reply. "Come in," she says softly, voice hoarse.

I tug my deep red Amity shirt down, trying to ignore the brightness of it.

"The Amity are meeting in half an hour," I say, my voice taking on a hint of melodrama. "_To decide our fate,_" I say, my eyebrows quirking.

Tris shakes her head in shame. "Never thought my fate would be in the hands of a bunch of Amity."

"Me either. Oh, I bought you something," I say, humor still residing on my face. I open a bottle, pulling out a dropper filled with a water-like liquid. "Pain medicine. Take a dropperful every six hours."

"Thanks," Tris says quietly. She squeezes the dropper into her throat. She makes a face, probably because it tastes like lemon.

Awkwardly, I hook my finger in my belt loop, teetering on my heels.

"How are you, Beatrice?" I ask softly.

"Did you just call me _Beatrice?_" She sounds incredulous.

I smile softly to myself. "Thought I would give it a try. Not good?"

"Maybe on special occasions only," she says, smiling through her mock disgust. I can't help but smile back. "Initiation days, Choosing days…" her voice trails off.

I don't think that Tris realizes that there will be _no more_ Initiation days. Not anymore.

"It's a deal," I say, smile fading. "How are you, Tris?"

I see her muscles tense, and I don't know why, but guilt floods through my veins.

"I'm…" her voice trails off again. She keeps shaking her head. "I don't know, Four." Her use of my nickname scares me a little. "I'm awake. I…"

She still shakes her head. Nervously, I slide my hand softly across her cheek, pressing my lips softly into hers.

Her eyes fill with guilt as I pull away.

"I know," I whisper. The fear in her eyes tells me that she did something horrible. I know exactly what she's thinking. _How do you know?_ "Sorry. I shouldn't have asked. "Sorry. I shouldn't have asked."

She closes her eyes, savoring something only she can see.

"I'll let you get ready," I whisper.

She leaves for the shower, and I think it might be a good idea to do the same.

After I get out of the shower, I find Caleb waiting outside my door for me.

It's time for the trial, then.

We walk quietly down the hallway to Tris's room.

When we arrive, I see a different person than the small, skinny, Abnegation girl I met a month ago.

"You cut your hair," Caleb says in shock.

"Yeah," she says softly. "It's… too hot for long hair."

"Fair enough," Caleb says.

We walk down the hallway together, the only sound filling my ears is the creaking of the old floorboards.

"Does everyone know you're Marcus's son?" It takes me a minute to realize that Caleb is talking to me. "The Abnegation, I mean?"

"Not to my knowledge," I say softly. "And I would appreciate it if you didn't mention it."

"I don't need to mention it," he says snottily. "Anyone with eyes can see it for themselves," he says, giving me a classic Erudite frown. "How old are you, anyway?"

"Eighteen," I say, knowing exactly what's coming next.

"And you don't think you're too old to be with my little sister?" He turns, facing me point-blank.

I let out a short laugh. "She isn't _your little_ anything."

"Stop it," Tris says sternly. "Both of you."

A crowd of Amity stand cautiously before us, staring as we bicker.

We step through the wide open doors to the trial room, looking at the faces staring back at us.

I hear Tris take in a gulp of air beside me, and I touch my fingertips to the small of her back to comfort her.

Every second feels like my skin is burning, and by the time it starts, my flesh is gone.

"We have before us today an urgent question," she says, "which is: How will we conduct ourselves in this time of conflict as people who pursue peace?"

Every Amity in the room starts to talk.

"How do they get anything done?" Tris asks me.

"They don't care about efficiency," I respond softly, so only she can hear me. "They care about agreement. Watch."

Everyone in the room sits in small circles discussing. I only catch a few words, but _Dauntless_ and _Erudite_ seem to be repeated often.

"This is bizarre," Tris says.

"I think it's beautiful," I respond with integrity, ignoring the look Tris shoots me.

That's the one good thing about being with the Amity, I don't have to keep up the facade of being Dauntless anymore.

"What?" I ask, with a laugh. "They each have an equal role in government; they each feel equally responsible. And it makes them care; it makes them kind. I think that's beautiful."

"I think it's unsustainable," Tris says grumpily. "Sure, it works for the Amity. But what happens when not everyone wants to strum banjos and grow crops? What happens when someone does something terrible and talking about it doesn't solve the problem?"

A little bit of me dies in her words. Beatrice Prior is many things, smart, deadly, cunning, attractive, but she isn't kind. I may not be the kindest person either, but at least I try. At least I value peace.

But all I can do is shrug. "I guess we'll find out."

"They're not going to let us argue with them, are they," she says.

"I doubt it," I whisper back.

The same thought that flashes across her eyes is in my mind. _We are screwed._

After a long time of waiting, Johanna Reyes finally takes her seat.

"Our faction has had a close relationship with Erudite for as long as we can remember. We need each other to survive, and we have always cooperated with each other. But we have also had a strong relationship with Abnegation in the past, and we do not think it is right to revoke the hand of friendship when it has for so long been extended," she says, voice sweet. "We feel that the only way to preserve our relationships with both factions is to remain impartial and uninvolved. Your presence here, though welcome, complicates that."

Here comes the doom.

"We have arrived at the conclusion that we will establish our faction headquarters as a safe house for members of all factions, under a set of conditions. The first is that no weaponry of any kind is allowed on the compound. The second is that if any serious conflict arises, whether verbal or physical, all involved parties will be asked to leave. The third is that the conflict may not be discussed, even privately, within the confines of this compound. An the fourth is that everyone who stays here must contribute to the welfare of this environment by working. We will report this to Erudite, Candor, and Dauntless as soon as we can."

Suddenly, her eyes smack into mine.

"You are welcome to stay here if and only if you abide by our rules. This is our decision."

Suddenly, I think of Tris's gun in her room.

We won't last long.

"We won't be able to stay long," she whispers to me.

"No," I respond, frowning. "We won't."

* * *

**As usual, I'll mention:**

**FFN ****_still_**** won't allow me to post in Welsh. ****_PLEASE_**** email them about this and tag the 'Subject' line: [category] New Language: Welsh:Cymraeg**

**Thanks!**


End file.
